3 inspiring sons... and their little sister

Be Nice

2011-11-01T00:34:00.000-08:00

First I need to preface this post. I don't need advice. Please don't feel the need to comment and give me advice or reprimand me. However, if you would like to leave comments such as Amy, you are the BEST! I can't believe someone wouldn't like you! or Amy, I can't believe it! You are amazing and anyone who doesn't agree is just off their rocker! or something equally wonderful, that would be just fine. It's a free country after all and you are entitled to your opinion. Especially if it is a glowing recommendation of me as a person, friend, and all around wonderful woman. But just take notice, I retain the right to delete any comment that makes me sad. Or mad. So there.

This is where I am glad that only three people ever read my blog on a regular basis and all three of them love me for who I am. Warts and all. Especially when I behave badly.

BFF Kim, I know you are reading this. I just want to say that it was so wonderful having you here this weekend! It went by way too fast and I wish you could have stayed! I think you and Shawn and Jake and I should go away for a week somewhere! I learned on a recent trip that some people are just not travel compatible, no matter what, but I think we would have a blast! We could continue our conversation on the state of the world to day and the solutions to all the problems. I know that if you and I had any real power, we could mop this country up and get it back on track!

And Leggs, I think you may read this. (In fact, I'll post the link on your Facebook wall to make sure you see it!) You've been with me since 9th grade and you have to love me. It's a requirement when you've been friends for 24 years! You've seen the good the bad and the ugly and we danced to I Think We're Alone Now when you came to visit me in Cedar City when we were seniors in high school and we both had totally 80's haircuts. I know I can always count on you to defend my honor.

And Courtney, we haven't know each other even a year... but you rock. Plain and simple. And we may be related through marriage one day and so it's a good thing we like each other.

Now that my preamble is out of the way, where do I begin? I have so much I want to say (share) with you. What I'm undecided on is whether I should give you the Reader's Digest version, or if I should write the full story as installments to catch you up. Perhaps I'll start with the Reader's Digest version and then I can expound later.

Today is Halloween. Miss B was the cutest kangaroo ever. Sam was a burglar. Josh was an injured pilot. Jacob stayed home and passed out candy while Jake and I took Miss B around the neighborhood. We went with our friends from across the street and their son Noah who just turned 3 and is Miss B's best friend. They love each other. I have pictures of them kissing to prove it.

There was a lot of drama leading up to Halloween which is one of the stories I think I will expound on later, but it involved my children going through a million different costume choices (starting at least 2 months ago) before settling on the final costume at 3pm today. It drove me batty and I may have lost my temper today when they wanted to cut up one of my good sheets to use as a part of a costume. All I can say is... another Halloween down. It's one of my least favorite holidays. Next to Easter. Not the "Jesus Christ was resurrected" Easter, but the "Easter Bunny/basket/eggs/overdosing of candy" Easter. I love Thanksgiving and Christmas. Those holidays can stay. The tooth fairy also annoys me. In case you were wondering.

I was feeling a little hormonal today. And on top of the hormones (or perhaps because of the hormones) I have a cold sore. I hate cold sores. I suppose I'm PMSing. I think PMS is real. It can be a real B****. It's not an excuse. Sometimes I hear myself being angry and ugly and I think, What in the Hell am I doing? But I can't quite seem to get a handle on it. I'd say my children would agree with that summary today.

Unfortunately it spilled over to some drama with some people we know today. I suppose today was not the day to piss me off. We have some friends we've known for a little more than a year. We were pretty close for a while, but the wife and I both have pretty strong personalities (isn't that a nice way of putting it?) and we don't quite see the world the same. She also really doesn't like my children (at least two of them) which puts me on the defensive. I knew something was brewing between the two of us, I could sense it, but I couldn't quite put my finger on it. It was just little things here and there along with some pretty intense conversations about the way we parent our children and live the gospel and our responsibilities as citizens in this country. To say we disagree would be an understatement.

I'm not perfect. Boy do I ever have many, many flaws. But I stand up for the things I feel strongly about. And so does she. So it shouldn't have been any surprise that we would have to go our different ways. I just figured we'd both just keep making nice until it was time for my family to move in a few months. She must have figured it wasn't worth the effort.

She had a big ol' Halloween party with many of our common friends tonight and very conspicuously did not invite us. It probably wouldn't have been a big deal except I stopped by when we were out trick or treating and I saw all of our friend's cars out front. It didn't take long for me to realize that this was a party I was not invited to.

Wow. Felt like high school. Except that has never happened to me before, even in high school. But it sure felt like drama that would happen with teenage girls. I was hurt at first. Really hurt. And then I got angry. I confronted her. She told me that I had the right to invite people to my house without inviting her and she had the same right. She has a point. I suppose it was rather arrogant to believe that I would be invited to the party just because everyone else was invited too.

So I went home and defriended her on Facebook. Ha! Now that was childish. She obviously doesn't care. I'm the one that is hurt and mad and sad. But I looked around at my children and my husband and realized that I have everything that I want and need right here in my own living room. I'm not going to let drama get the best of me. I'm sure I'll need to apologize, but the reality is that we are just too different to be friends. That's not a bad thing. Not everyone is friends. But we should all be nice.

Miss B's Kitchen

2011-10-19T22:18:00.002-08:00

Broken Binkie

2011-10-16T23:35:00.000-08:00

Miss B has been a binkie baby from the very first. As she got older and we said goodbye to bottles, I wasn't ready to wean her from the bink. I'm a mom who says let them be little. I'm not anxious for her to grow up anytime soon.

I think we have it backwards in our society. We press our little ones to grow up and become little people before they are ready. (Like that Your Baby Can Read program. Why in the world does your baby need to read??) Oh my word, I could talk all day about parents pushing academics on their children at young ages. For many, after pushing and pushing through grade school, they reach high school and it becomes about having a good time, sports, cars, dating, parties. They are told that these are the best years of their lives and they need to enjoy every minute. It doesn't stop at high school. It continues through college and into life. There's a whole world out there not taking responsibility for themselves (yet expecting others to do it for them). But in third grade they could probably do their times tables in under 5 minutes.

Here's my theory: let children be children and then when the time comes, give them the responsibility to become a young adult rather than a teenager. Teach them how to work hard and do hard things, how to think for themselves and provide for themselves. They are capable of it. They will rise to the occasion if you expect it of them and allow them to do it. They will find incredible satisfaction in the journey. Let's raise leaders and not followers.

So in my home, my little ones (Miss B and Sam-a-lam) are busy being children. They play and explore and build and read. I'm not worried about whether or not Sam knows his multiplication tables (he doesn't) or if Miss B knows her alphabet (she doesn't). I'm more concerned about the lessons they are learning in character which will last the rest of their lives. Who they are, what their role is in our family, that their Heavenly Father loves them, how to be nice, how to work hard (alongside their brothers and mom and dad), how to choose the right. And the interesting thing is that learning occurs along the way. It has to. Sam reads. Miss B counts. It happened in the course of being children rather than a strict curriculum that had to be accomplished.

I guess I'll step down from that soap box. I have so much to say on the subject and it isn't even the reason I started to write. I'll add that I know that not everyone fits the mold I described. There are many wonderful young adults out there who stand for something and are going to change the world. I've met them. Also, I couldn't possibly describe my entire parenting philosophy in three paragraphs. But really, I feel passionately about letting our children be children and leaving the requirements in academics for later.

What was I saying? Oh yes, Miss B's binkie. Her bink was our constant companion. We didn't leave the house without one. She couldn't make it the six miles to town without it. If we pulled out of the driveway without one we'd turn around, because we'd made that mistake before. We'd scour the house before bedtime, shining flashlights under couches and beds in hopes to find one so that she would go to sleep. On cleaning days, at least a half a dozen binkies would show up and be stashed away in case of emergency (like bedtime).

But the last few months I've noticed that her teeth were starting to form to her bink. Perhaps it was my imagination (or paranoia) but I knew that the bink was going to have to disappear and sooner rather than later and I was not looking forward to it. Last weekend Jake had a 3 day weekend and it was perfect timing to do it. We received plenty of advice on the course to take and we decided to snip the ends of the pacifier off (not in front of her of course) and tell her they were broken.

Boy did that make her mad! She threw a big ol' fit when the bink didn't work right. She stopped taking naps. (She's been 10 days without a bink and 10 days without a nap.) She had trouble getting to sleep at night and couldn't sleep past 6:30am. The first 7 days she was irritable and naughty due to lack of sleep and missing her bink. She got her share of spanks that week. I understand she was going through a rough patch, but she still had to be nice.

Finally the last couple days she's started to settle into a routine. This morning she actually slept until 9:40. Jake had duty today and I was exhausted from the last week and so I jumped at the chance to continue sleeping and skip church.

She was so happy today. Just like her old self. She watched Mickey Mouse Clubhouse and read books with me. She ate a hearty breakfast, lunch and dinner. And by 8:30 she easily went down to bed.

I think we may be over the worst of it. (Knock on wood.)

But we'll see what time she drags my butt out of bed in the morning.

Oh right, I'll be dragging myself out of bed in the morning. Because it's Sam-a-lam's birthday! He's 9 years old tomorrow! And that means breakfast in bed. He requested chocolate chip pancakes with strawberries and dad's brown sugar syrup. Sounds like a sugar rush to me. But you only get breakfast in bed once a year.

D.C. Take Two

2011-10-01T02:49:00.002-08:00

A few years ago we were living in Altus, Oklahoma for a few months while Jake was attending KC-135 training. Jacob was 10 years old. I grew up with 6 sisters and my only brothers were much younger than me. Boys were always an enigma and as my son approached adolescence, he was no different. I wasn't sure how to relate to him, nor him to me. Jake and I decided that Jacob and I should take some time alone together, away from the rest of the family to help our relationship. After much discussion, Jacob and I chose Washington D.C. as our destination. Neither of us had been there and we both had a deep interest in history and so it was a logical choice.

It was unbeknownst to me at the time, but a tradition was born. A year or so ago when Joshua turned 10, he started to ask when he and I were going to take a mother/son trip. This time we decided to invite friends and their mothers to enjoy the fun. And so here we are, Saturday morning at 6:30 am in our hotel room in Washington D.C., all dressed up and ready to leave shortly for a tour of the White House.

We've been here since Wednesday afternoon. Our trip here was three flights and 17 hours. We were exhausted. My sister and her son arrived a few hours after we did and our adventure began. We've been non stop walking and exploring. There have been high points and low points. Foolishly I tried a new pair of shoes and was rewarded with 4 spanking new blisters for my trouble. That's been slightly inconvenient. And I left my wallet on the trolley after our tour yesterday. I wish I was kidding. It was found and returned with nothing missing within two hours and I have to say that I am thankful for honest people and answered prayers!

Joshua high points include: A new fedora from Hard Rock Cafe. He looks so dapper! An hour long spy operation adventure at the International Spy Museum with his cousin. He's crazy excited for The Air and Space Museum. He's been asking to go every day since we got here. Unfortunately it's on the schedule for our last day. He loves the pizza place next door. Our guide shared ghost stories on our Capitol tour and I don't think he'll ever forget them. He thinks it's cool that our trolley delivered us home to our hotel both times we rode it. (Special treatment!) He's anticipating meeting the First Lady or her children while we are at the White House today. He figures the President is probably to busy.

It's time to walk out the door, but I'll leave you with some pictures of our visit so far...

15 Weeks of {52 Dresses}

2011-09-24T14:38:00.001-08:00

Adventures

2011-09-24T02:44:00.000-08:00

Did you see the posts over at Simply b Photos about my trip to California? No? You can check them out here and here. And I took some pics of Miss B last night amid the gorgeous fall colors. You can see them here.

I'm getting a facelift here at 3 Inspiring Sons pretty soon. The same amazing gal who did my Simply b Photos web design is hooking me up with a new setup here. Seriously can't wait! But first I have to choose just one of the fantastic logos she designed and I'm not sure I can do that!

In other news, the other night I was heading out to a photoshoot and had to stop at the taxiway for aircraft traffic. It just happened to be my husband flying the plane. As it approached I thought, "I wish I had my camera!" and I reached for my phone before I realized I did have my camera, right next to me on the seat! Unfortunately I had my 85mm lens rather than my wider angle 24mm lens but it captured the moment (looking right through my windshield). When we leave Kodiak I'll never forget stopping at the stop sign for airplanes and helicopters to taxi by.

If you look close you can see Jake waving at me. Love that man.

Let's see... what else is happening? Oh! Joshua and I leave next week for Washington D.C. I can't believe it's already here. My sister Amanda and her son Tyler as well as my good friend Nancy and her son Colton are coming with us. I'm sure there will be lots of stories to tell from that trip!

Fall is definitely on the island and winter will be following soon enough. We're still making our plans for what we're going to do after the first of the year. We're slowly beginning to eek a plan out. Do you Pinterest? If you don't, you are missing out. Jake has an account and he pinned this picture last week and tagged me. I swooned a bit when I saw it. On the advice of my sister, I think it should be our family motto. I think it needs to be displayed somewhere in our home. Jake and I are adventurers. We can't help it.

Today we went on a walk and just minutes into it he turned to me and said, "I can't keep a secret. I want to take you somewhere fabulous for our anniversary." (#17 is coming up next month.) I laughed and said, "What about Hawaii?" (We just got back a few weeks ago.)

Him: I was thinking Italy.

Me: Italy?! Wow!

Him: Yeah, but you are so much better at the planning and organizing.

Me: (laughing) Okay. But we really don't have the money or the time for that. (Or something to that effect.)

Him: Yeah, we should just take the kids to Disneyland in January.

Me: Or rent a motorhome and tour the country.

Him: That would be so fun!

And so it goes... we're always thinking of grand adventures we'd love to take together. It makes me happy.

Night Swimming

2011-09-08T21:16:00.003-08:00

Sam and I are having a great time in California!

Layover in Anchorage

2011-09-07T10:55:00.000-08:00

Sam and I are sequestered at the Anchorage airport waiting for our flight. We're on our way to Sacramento for EIGHT DAYS (as Sam puts it). We found some cozy seats in the corner of Starbucks and we're camped out.

Blogging seemed like a good idea to help pass the time. But you know how I hate to blog without a picture. Enter iPhone pictures...

Although there are close to 1000 of them, my iPhone pictures hardly see the light of day. Occasionally I will upload one to Facebook, but other than that they remain tucked away where no one sees them.

I started scrolling through from the beginning, but then quickly jumped ahead to some of the more recent images, and selected a few of my faves.

Sam and Miss B at the Anchorage 5th Avenue Mall. April 2010.

Dad and Miss B. April 21, 2010 at IHOP after Miss B was sealed to our family at the Anchorage, Alaska Temple. Because nothing celebrates an occasion like pancakes.

The boys. Anchorage to Kodiak. April 2010. All dressed up after attending the temple.

Fast forward to this year... May 2011. Miss B studying the fish at the Touch Tank in Kodiak.

Sam brave enough to handle the sea star.

Miss B keeping Santa's seat warm for him. North Pole, Alaska May 2011.

Miss B and Daddy and Boo Bear at Java Flats, Kodiak. June 2011.

Miss B and her BFF Noah. June 2011. Kodiak Commissary.

These two are trouble.

Miss B is spending the morning with Noah today. Jacob and Josh had online classes at the same time and so Noah's Mommy is watching over her. I got a text saying they were eating chocolate chip waffles and watching the Disney Channel. Miss B will never want to go home!

June 2011. Kodiak Ward Nursery. Miss B in her favorite spot at church, the airplane in the nursery.

Each week about halfway through sacrament meeting, she loudly asks to play with her friends and the airplane. She has a thing for airplanes. (Can't imagine why.) Last week during sacrament meeting, the church got buzzed by a small plane. Miss B gasped with glee and shouted "Airplane!!"

Miss B and her daddy. Walking to the commissary. July 2011.

Miss B's first trip to the movie theatre. August 13, 2011. Mr. Poppers Penguins.

She did wonderfully, chomping on popcorn and Red Vines. And then she peed all over daddy's lap.

Her first Build a Bear August 24, 2011.

She was fine until the machine started to fill fluff into the bear. Then she cried and wouldn't go near it, until Daddy held her in his lap. Teddy Bear is now her constant companion.

Miss B and Mr. Israel Young on the C-130 flight from Anchorage to Kodiak, August 2011.

Mr. Young is also Brother Young and our next door neighbor. He's possibly the funniest men I've ever met. My boys will knock on the wall that separates our living rooms and sing "Israel, Israel, God is Calling...". Don't you wish you lived next to us?

Just call her Imelda.

Puddle jumping in the rain outside Walmart. One of life's little joys. September 2011.

I finally got the pictures printed from Miss B's Tea Party Shoot.

These gorgeous frames were on clearance at Pottery Barn at the beginning of the year and I snatched them up. Jake filled the frames for me yesterday (including the one in the center from The Organic Bloom) and I'm in LOVE.

We tried a few layouts on the living room floor before coming up with one that worked.

(The biggest pictures are 20"x30")

The finished product.

I'm thinking our next home will need a nicely painted wall behind these frames.

Which brings us to today.

Mr Sam-a-lam and I are heading out on our Big Adventure. He is so excited he can't stand it. He's been packed for days and carried his suitcase around the house worried he might misplace it and anxious to leave.

He just told me that this (our Big Adventure) was even better than when Dad took him to The Crab Festival all by himself. Those are big words my friends. I've definitely grown in his esteem.

We just spent $17.00 at Starbucks buying hot chocolate (for me), a Vanilla Bean (for him), a pastry, and a water. Spendy.

Now he's playing on the iTouch and I'm blogging.

We hurried out of the house today as the sun was rising and I've already begun to make a list of the things I've forgotten. Like Sam's church shirt and socks. I meant to grab them this morning and didn't. And I forgot to get my sunglasses. They weren't at the forefront of my thoughts. We don't wear sunglasses very often in Kodiak. But I have a feeling I'll want them in California.

I know that our time in Sacramento is going to fly. My hopes for the trip include a pedicure, a trip to IKEA, and a visit to the movie theater to see "The Help". (As well as a trip to the mall to get Sam a church shirt and socks... and perhaps a haircut for him as well. Ya think?!)

I'm wishing I brought some wipies. Wipies are handy even when you don't have a toddler. 8 year olds can be just as sticky as a toddler.

I'm also wishing I'd brought Mr. Earle along. I miss him terribly when we're apart. Heck, I should have brought the whole family. We could have made a detour down to Disneyland. But then it wouldn't have been Sam and I's Big Adventure. He feels special and loved and that's important when you are the youngest son and have two big brothers and the cutest little sister and they all seem to eclipse you. He's going to remember this trip for the rest of his life.

(Becky, remember when you got to go with Dad on that business trip and he took you to Disneyland?! I do. Boy, we were all so jealous of you!)

My World This Morning

2011-09-01T23:37:00.001-08:00

I love homeschool.

This was my Facebook status last week. When I logged on, my feed was full of pictures of children with their backpacks on heading out to the first day of school. My children were still sleeping. It was a glorious day here in Kodiak and I was glad that summer wasn't over yet for my family. Summer in Alaska is fleeting as it is without school stealing the last couple weeks.

I don't have anything against public school. It's just not right for us and I appreciate that I have the choice. I have objectives for my children other than those taught at school. I'm not so concerned about grade levels or standardization, multiplication or states and capitals. I'm more concerned about individuality, family relationships, work ethic, and teaching my kiddos how to think for themselves. I no longer worry about the rest. I have every confidence that they will learn what needs to be learned when the time is right.

I've watched it play out in our eldest son. He's a fantastic kid. He's smart and dedicated. He's a hard worker (just like his dad) and when he puts his mind to something, he accomplishes it. He'll graduate in April two years ahead of schedule. His life has been full of adventures. He's a well seasoned traveler and a talented athlete. Throughout his education he has been immersed in the classics. He's read Montesquieu, Locke, and Shakespeare. He's acted in plays and directed movies. He loves to talk politics and does a pretty good job defending his views. He enjoys watching FoxNews. He's not your average 15 year old, and he's okay with that.

He may have a dozen years of schooling behind him, but his scholar phase has only emerged within the last couple. Just as it should, just as we expected. The early years of our children's schooling career are filled with home, love, work and play. We don't worry so much about the scholarly stuff. We are introducing a love of learning. A love of life. A love of adventure. A love of work. A love of home. A love of family. You'd be amazed what they pick up during all of that! And then soon enough their world begins to expand and they are ready to devote their time to the hard stuff.

I'm watching our middle son Joshua go through similar transitions as Jacob did at his age. It's reassuring.

I was inspired this morning to take some pictures of our life. Our everyday real life.

...

We're having a not so early morning this morning. I woke up at 8:30(ish) and the house was quiet. Jake had left for work and Jacob was in the basement logged in to class at Williamsburg Academy. His semester started yesterday. Sam, Josh and Miss B were still snoring.

I took advantage of the time to peruse Pinterest, read a few blogs, answer some emails, and generally enjoy the quiet from my bedroom. Then Miss B awoke and started to squawk. Her squawking sounds something like, "Joooooooosh. Joooooooosh. JOOOOOOOSH!"

I got her out of her crib (thank goodness she hasn't learned to climb out yet) and took her to wake her brothers. Sam woke immediately while Josh pretended he couldn't hear me. The sun was streaming in their room. I wish my bedroom got such beautiful morning light.

This is what we call a lazy morning. We're on our own timeline around here. We have periods during the year where we keep a rather tight schedule. Other times we play it by ear. It appears to have no rhyme or reason. Some may say there's a whole lot of nothing going on. But I feel differently.

These days are the most important of all, these days when my children are little. They grow quickly and I want this time with them. Soon enough there will be demands on their time, but for now I cherish these moments. Snuggling, reading, cleaning, baking, or whatever the day calls for.

Miss B likes to be cozy.

Good morning Miss B.

Good morning Sam-a-lam.

These two are such good friends.

I could sit and watch them all day.

Two little monkeys jumping on the bed...

One of Josh's daily chores is giving Miss B a bath as soon as breakfast is over. I missed getting pictures of breakfast this morning. It was a disaster this morning too. You would have enjoyed those pictures for sure.

For some unknown reason, Josh always brings Miss B down from her bath naked. I'm not sure what he has against putting a diaper on her upstairs, but every morning she streaks through the house nude. She'll stand in the window and flash whoever happens to be standing in the vacant field behind our house. (You'd be surprised how many people frequent said field.) She'll run willy nilly until someone catches her and demands she hold still long enough for a diaper to be place securely on that bum.

Josh had dish duty this morning. We don't really have chore charts or schedules. We should. I believe it would make my life easier. I'm going to get right on that.
Of course, if my children would just pick up after themselves...

I digress.
Josh had dish duty. He's wearing his swimsuit, even though we have no plans to visit the pool.
He can do that because he's homeschooled.

Sam was feeling a little put upon this morning. You can tell from his body language. His hands are saying, "What?! Why do I have to do that?!"

Hey, I said I like having my kids around. I didn't say it was a piece of cake. We're pretty dang normal in the kids don't wanna do chores department.

He likes to take 10 minutes to do something that should take 30 seconds. (Like get the rag wet.) He was feeling particularly ornery this morning.

Meanwhile I managed to get both a diaper and shirt on Miss B. She's still missing pants and her glasses. But she's found her boots. She loves her boots because she can put them on herself.

And that's Teddy Bear. She carries her everywhere. Teddy Bear wears panties!

Come here Miss B, let me put some pants on you!

Look Mom! I did it myself!

I could follow this girl around all day and photograph her every move.

Hi Teddy Bear! Would you like a binky? Try mine!

We'll work on shoes on the right feet another day.

Sam-a-lam is still mad. And he certainly doesn't want me taking pictures.

So I'll take pictures of the water cooler.

Sam-a-lam, don't be sad. I love you.

Kids are fed, chores are done, Sam finally went to get dressed, and now it's time to move on to the rest of our day. Dad will be home for lunch shortly.

But first, a quick pic of this infamous duo. They are hardly separated. Miss B and Joshie Squashie were friends in Heaven. I know they were. They are kindred souls. Best friends. Brother and sister.

There you have it. That was my world this morning. I'll have to write another post about our afternoons.

Back To School

2011-08-29T23:51:00.006-08:00

I'm finally updating my blog due to Audrey's comment on my last post (which was something like, "Write a new post ALREADY!!" Thanks for the motivation Audrey! Sometimes I forget that people even care.

I'm afraid that 2011's Blog Book is going to be pathetic. And not because 2011 was a slow year, but because it was too busy. Busy right up until October 30th. And then I plan on having all the time in the world (a girl can dream right?!). Because on October 30th Simply b Photos will begin a leave of absence until after we transfer to our next location (wherever that might be). Actually, I'm doing one more Day With Amy Workshop on November 5th, but then I'll be done. For reals. Unless your name is Audrey and you are having a baby named Birdy in November. Then I will take your daughter's newborn pictures for you.

The good news is I'm teaching a PRO class the end of October. I hope to give some really fantastic photographers a little boost in their own businesses. Simply b has had a big presence in the photography world in Kodiak and I'm looking forward to mentoring those who will be replace me when I'm gone.

The 2011-2012 school year has started. This means that Jake and I have been out of high school for TWENTY years. Oh. My. Word. Our 17th anniversary is quickly approaching. Although we already celebrated. Remember Hawaii? I do. This year on October 20th I'll be in Anchorage teaching a PRO class there. Maybe I'll send Jake flowers.

Please ignore my ramblings. It's almost midnight, but Audrey's comment was such a call to arms that I couldn't go another day without writing some sort of nonsense.

Interested in what's happening around here?

Miss B when through some crazy sleep weirdness. She went three days without a nap and only slept a few hours at night. We went to Anchorage for a medical appointment and the crazy of that day seemed to reset her cycle. Thank goodness.

She's a hoot. She has a deep husky voice that will make you laugh anytime you hear it. If you say "Hi Daddy" in your best Cookie Monster impersonation, you would sound just like her. Her favorite phrase is "Wuz Zat?" She loves her new teddy bear from Build-A-Bear. It wears panties. (That's me thinking ahead to the potty training part of toddlerhood.) The boys hate the word panties. They cringe every time I say it. I like to say it a lot so I can watch them shudder.

Sam is going into 3rd grade this year. He needs another haircut. He and I leave next week for Sacramento. Our intention is to spend a week lying by my sister Amanda's swimming pool. I hope we don't have to do anything else! (Although I will be teaching A Day With Amy workshop there too.) Sam says he just wants to wear his swimsuit all day!

Josh is making a movie. He's written the script and drawn out the storyboards. He'd be deep into filming if he could find the charger for our video camera. I'm annoyed that it's lost and we can't find it anywhere. He's starting online classes with Leadership Education Academy next week. He's thrilled and can't wait for them to start.

Jacob is home from Elevation and starts school on Wednesday. Did you know this is his senior year of high school? Technically he would be a sophomore, but because he started Williamsburg's three year program a year early he's finishing two years early. Did you catch all that? He's still working on his life plans and what to do after graduation, but he knows he'll be home at least one more year after graduation. Sixteen is too young to leave the nest, no matter how mature he thinks he is. He's also trying to finish his Eagle Project and learn how to drive.

We're working on some plans for his last semester of high school. We'd like to take him somewhere he can have more social interaction. I'm not sure how it's all going to come together, but we've decided to wait until November 1st (after Simply b is closed) to make any major decisions.

Jake filled out his dream sheet for next year's transfers. We agonized over it and now we just have to wait until next February/March to learn our fate. Not knowing is killing me. There are so many decisions to be made that would be easily answered if we knew where we are going. What kind of car should we buy? Are we going to sell the truck? Where should we go with Jacob next Semester? Should I keep all my studio equipment or sell it? Should we take the kids to Disneyland in January? Knowing where we are going would help us answer all of those.

If the kids and I move next semester we'll need a new car. But will we be living in the Continental United States (CUS) after our next transfer? If so then I want a nice mini van for road trips. Will we be living in Hawaii? Then the car doesn't matter so much. If we are in the CUS {Jake just informed me that the abbreviation for the Continental United States is CONUS. That sounds better.} then we want to keep Jake's truck, but it is unnecessary in Hawaii. Where we live and what kind of house we get are going to directly affect whether or not I keep all my studio equipment. Are we moving to Sacramento next June? If so, we don't want to take the kids to Disneyland this January, we'll just wait until we get down there. See what I mean?

Patience. Is. A. Virtue.

I'll keep repeating that.

And seriously? It's all going to be here before we know it. Because this week is September 1, 2011. Where has 2011 gone?

What dreams are made of.

2011-08-19T07:02:00.000-08:00

This is what my dreams are made of.

And this.

And this.

I mean really?

I think there are two ways to vacation. There's the kind that leaves you needing a vacation from your vacation and the one that leaves you rested and rejuvenated. We opted for option #2.

Don't get me wrong, Hawaii is a happening place. Oahu offers plenty to do: tour Pearl Harbor, visit the Dole Pineapple Plantation, surf the North Shore, hike Diamond Head, sightsee Waikiki, snorkel at Hanauma Bay, enjoy a luau at Polynesian Cultural Center... along with plenty of other attractions.

Instead, We lounged by the pool (me in the sun, Jake next to me in the shade) and ate pina colada/strawberry shave ice. We swam in the lagoon. Ate at amazing restaurants. Held hands as we watched the sun go down. We slept till we were done and took naps in the middle of the afternoon. We spent hours sitting on the beach in the moonlight as the waves lapped our feet. Lazily we dug holes in the sand and watched as the ocean filled them up. Then we slipped into the hot tub before retiring to our suite.

Our time away was rejuvenating... mind, body and soul. We had the most incredible time... ever. Our stay at the Ko'Olina Marriott Beach Club was first class luxury at its finest. You must go. (And when you do, check out this insane deal! We paid a lot more than that - wish I'd seen this deal before we went!)

Heaven. On. Earth.

We did venture out for a visit to the LDS Temple in Laie, which was beautiful and peaceful and the perfect addition to our itinerary.

We stopped at Haleiwa on the North Shore for shave ice. The lines were insane, but we waited to see what the fuss was all about. (Personally I preferred the shave ice poolside at our hotel.)

But mostly, we retreated into our own little world. Just Amy and Jake. Jake and Amy. It was perfection. I can't wait to do it again. As. Soon. As. Possible.

Lap of Luxury

2011-08-03T00:33:00.009-08:00

Jake and I got married in Las Vegas almost 17 years ago. We spent our first night as a naive married couple at Caesar's Palace. Jake's cousin worked there and had reserved us a fancy room complete with round bed and plush terrycloth robes we could take home with us. We felt like kings.

I chuckle now looking back at us. We were young, just 21 years old. And we really didn't have a clue. We parked at the parking garage across the street from the hotel and carried our luggage (including my wedding dress) through the casino floor looking for our room. Fresh from the Temple of the Lord where we had just made covenants to each other for time and all eternity, we were now surrounded by the world. Smoke lingered in the air, people perched on stools in front of slot machines with a bucket of nickels in one hand and a drink in another. We felt awkward and out of place, but had no idea what else we could have done. We had no idea about valet parking.

We've learned a lot the last few years. We've traveled more than most and are fairly comfortable with the process.

Today we flew from Kodiak to Honolulu. We're celebrating the last seventeen years with a trip, just Jake and I. Our children are safely tucked away at home. This trip is a big deal, we've been giddy about it for months. We splurged on first class tickets and we rented a jeep. Just call me Fancy Nancy. By the way, first class was worth every penny for the 6 hour flight. I felt like a queen and committed then and there on that flight to never fly coach again. Except for when Sam and I go to Sacramento next month. And when Josh and I fly to Washington D.C. And really... who am I kidding? A girl can dream can't she?

During the planning stages, we debated back and forth as to where we should stay. We're loyal Marriott enthusiasts. My sisters tease me, but Marriott has never steered us wrong. Except for the Courtyard in Sonoma, California. That was a disappointment. But we'd heard great things about the Hale Koa in Waikiki. A military hotel with beach access and reasonable rates, downtown within walking distance of first class shopping and dining. I made our reservations and that was that.

Until we arrived. Actually, the arrival was fine. No valet, but the bag staff held our bags while we parked and then brought them up to our room. When we walked into the room my heart sank. I swear my family stayed in a room just like it when we visited Hawaii in 1983. From the balcony (where I took the picture posted above) if we craned our neck all the way to the right we could see how they justified calling it a beach view. Shrugging our shoulders, we dropped our bags and went in search of sustenance.

We followed our nose toward the beach where we took off our shoes and played in the surf. We strolled hand in hand along the wet sand and reveled in each others company. Dinner at PF Changs was followed by browsing shops and more hand holding. Our minds and bodies tired from a full day of travel we headed back to the room. We unpacked our suitcases, brushed our teeth and got ready to climb into bed. Jake slid between the covers first. The look on his face said it all.

There should be a rule that says that the bed you sleep in on vacation should be cozier than the bed you sleep in at home. Our hotel bed felt like an army cot. The room was unappealing, wornout and dingy but the bed was the final straw. Jake said he felt like he was at the alert facility back home complete with sandpaper sheets and itchy comforter. This was not how we saw our week of pampering going.

Within moments I found us a reservation online for just $30 more per night... at a Marriott. It may have been midnight but we packed our bags and checked out. The hotel staff didn't even blink. Customer service isn't high on their radar I suppose. Although perhaps we just got an off room on an off night. I can't say.

But I'm not 21 years old without a clue anymore. I'm typing from a king sized bed with luscious sheets and cozy pillows, in the lap of luxury. Now our vacation can begin.

*View from our balcony this morning... oh yeah, that's the ocean behind those trees. Guess who is going swimming this morning?

Update from Mom and Dad

2011-07-31T23:07:00.002-08:00

Dear Friends;

I'm sure by now you've been wondering what happened to us or what we have been doing. Once we arrived at the MTC we learned that they had changed our assignment from “Member and Leader Support” to “Mission Office”.

We would be working in the mission office! How could that be me? I don't even know how to use a computer!! I guess the joke is on me. I spent a week at the MTC getting familiar with computers. “Familiar” is not the right term, how about …. learning how to turn one on and sit in front of one for several hours. That better describes it.

Actually, I have been learning, The Lord truly is taking up the slack!

This mission has 180 missionaries and Paxton & I are in charge of all the cars (70) all the flats (apartments – 80), the medical issues, all the phones (80). We get phone calls all day and often in the middle of the night. This mission averages 5 vehicle accidents a month (most missionaries come from countries that drive on the “wrong side of the road” and the African missionaries have never driven a car. Most nighttime calls are for accidents and someone has to go to the hospital, you know the serious stuff. However, other calls are for “locked out of our flat”, “I don't feel well”, “my companion is dying”....

The office work that leaves us very tired at the end of the day, is dealing with Landlords, paying bills, finding new flats (when leases are up) , inspecting cars and flats (Paxton adds bicycles). Opening new missionary areas which require flats, furnishings, a car and/or bikes also provides stress because we aren't always given very much time to plan. Oh yes, we assist in moving out and into flats (we do get the missionaries in the area to help with this.)

Most nights we come home exhausted!! I'm sure it will get better as we get more familiar with our jobs and this beautiful country.

The mission office is located in Johannesburg which is a large modern city made up of lots and lots of small communities (Some very wealth and some very poor). South Africa fought it's “civil war” in the 1980's. Apartheid was ended in that year. Although the blacks were not slaves, they did not have equal rights. Today, everyone has equal rights, but not equal money or opportunity. The good news is that the African natives are flocking to the Church so the missionaries are busy, which keeps Sherry and I (Paxton at the keyboard now) very busy. They are a very kind and considerate people. Outside of the Church most of the native Africans we meet are “service people”, guards, deliveries, shop keepers, parking lot attendants, janitorial, etc. Tipping is very important, with many of these folks the tips they get are their only income. On garbage day, when we put our the trash, people will come up and go through the trash looking for recycle materials, by the time they leave there is not much for the garbage trucks to collect. You will find people on the streets everyday pushing large carts to the “recycler” and collect their daily wage. There are also numerous people at the intersections hawking various wares from trinkets to fruit and everything in between.

However, Satan is also raging so crime is very wide spread (This town at night reminds me of LA). The shops close around 6PM and the nights are dangerous. All the middle class communities have high (8 foot)fences with locked gates and most also have barbed wire or electric fences on top of the walls.

Although English is the official language, there are actually eleven accepted language so you will hear lots of conversations in public places that you can't understand. The other day I stopped at a gas station to get directions to a Mall that I knew was in the neighborhood. There were five clerks at the cash registers and when I ask “I'm looking for Makros near the Clearwater Mall”, several individuals stopped to try to answer my question and finally the clerk in charge told me to “talk to attendant” pointing to a tall handsome African working a gas pump. I went and asked him the same question and he answered in perfect English, pointing to an intersection across the road “go up that ramp and watch for the Clearwater Mall on the left. Makros is across the street.

Makros is like Costco and the Clearwater Mall is huge and contains a 3D cimima, they just couldn't understand my english.

One of the benefits of working in the office is that our area covers the entire mission. We are required to travel to all the areas and get to travel together. We are supplied a mission vehicle and reasonable expenses so travel and our jobs require it.

Well enough from us, drop us a line and let us know how you are doing.

Elder Paxton & Sister Sherry Oborn

Week 7 and 8 {52 Dresses}

2011-07-31T23:01:00.002-08:00

Water Games

2011-07-30T13:41:00.002-08:00

Life's Treasures

2011-07-25T23:25:00.006-08:00

At some point in Jacob's travels this year, he bought me a Mother's Day gift at Target. A fancy notebook (everyone knows I'm a sucker for a fancy notebook) and some caramels. He was gone for Mother's Day (why can't I remember where he was?) and forgot to give them to me.

But the other day he was cleaning out his room, found them, and brought them to me. I fussed over the notebook and ate the caramels. Then I put the notebook on the shelf by the others. I'm saving them for a divine purpose. Though I'm not sure what that is yet.

Today I was searching for a Photoshop recipe left over from notes I'd taken at one point or another. For the life of me I couldn't remember where I had written them (my notes). I began to search my notebooks. When I flipped open my latest Mother's Day gift, I noted one page of writing at the front.

My firstborn had written me a note.

A sappy, I love you Mom, melt my heart, bring tears to my eyes note.

I love my kids. And they love me. Can I be this lucky?

I am so blessed and sometimes I forget. How can I forget?

I've been so much more stressed the last year of my life than I have in the previous seventeen. That doesn't bode well for Simply b. I get that some moms don't have a choice. But I do. Time is passing too quickly as my children grow.

It's been an amazing experience, Simply b has. But it's time to reassess, reorganize, reinvent, reduce. I'm not sure what it will look like when I'm done, but I have a feeling it will look nothing like it does now. And I think I'm finally okay with that.

Because I will still be able to capture moments like this. Moments that I'm incredibly glad were saved to be remembered another day.

This is where my heart lies. Where my talents lie. Where my commitment lies. It could not be more clear.

Dear Mom and Dad

2011-07-25T00:12:00.008-08:00

How are you? I am good. I miss you.

I remember when I was a kid and I used to start all my letters like that. Life was easier then. But I'm still good and I do miss you. A lot. I hope you get into your permanent flat soon so that we can Skype. I wish we could have talked tonight. I have lots to tell you.

Sam cried on the way home from church today. I was so sad for him.

Miss B and I went to Primary singing time today. She doesn't like the nursery and she's too noisy to go to Relief Society. So we were singing with the kids and she was loving it. At the end of Primary, one of the leaders went to the front of the room and got a big bucket of lollipops. She asked how many of the kids read their scriptures the past week. It didn't have to be every day, but they had to have read scriptures at some point. Lots of kids raised their hands. (Background... the theme this year in Primary is scripture study and the leaders had started an incentive program. We've been gone the last two weeks as I was out of town last week and sick the week before so we didn't know about it.)

The leader started walking the rows asking who had read scriptures and handing out lollipops to those who had. She kept repeating that the kids were on the honor system and they couldn't have a lollipop if they hadn't read a scripture.

Really?!

Needless to say, we haven't read scriptures this week. (Or the past few weeks - months maybe?) And Sam is too honest to do anything but turn down a lollipop.

And too tenderhearted to do anything but cry on the way home because he was embarrassed and hurt. And then I cried with him. Because Primary shouldn't make him feel sad or left out.

I'm sure the leaders weren't meaning to hurt feelings and were just trying to give the kids an incentive to read their scriptures. But... every child should have gotten a lollipop. How about something like, "If you didn't read a scripture, try to remember this week." Because isn't this life all about second chances?

I'm shedding a few tears right now thinking about it. I'm all kinds of emotional. Sam shouldn't have had to feel bad or embarrassed about himself (or our family) at Primary because his mama failed to read scriptures with him. He should have left happy (sucking on a lollipop) and thinking, I'm going to read scriptures this week!

I'd just like to talk to you, cause there is lots more I'd like to complain about. I need some validation I suppose. I'd like to hear you say, "You're right. They're crazy." You can still say that right? Even though you are official representatives of Christ? You don't have to convince me to see the other side? I just need to vent and poor Jake has heard it all. I need fresh ears.

I cried a whole lot today. Jake wasn't sure what to do, so he bought me a Coke. I told Sam I'd buy him a whole bag of lollipops. Instead he and Jake made cupcakes, which had blue frosting and sprinkles... Sam's choice. You haven't had a real cupcake until you've had one of Jake's cupcakes. They are divine.

The house was a disaster today. I'm not even exaggerating when I use that word. Some friends stopped by to drop off cookies (no wonder I haven't lost that 100 pounds yet!) and I could have died of mortification. I'd folded two dozen loads of laundry and most of them had gotten put away, but there was still a lot laying around. Heaps of dirty clothes were on the dining room floor (supposedly in piles waiting to be washed), shoes piled in the entry, dishes strewn everywhere, toys, trash... you name it. I thought for a moment about trying to tidy while we talked, but couldn't figure out how to do it gracefully. So we just sat in my mess and enjoyed our visit. And the cookies were delicious. I've got my work cut out for me tomorrow.

Jake leaves in the morning. He's going to Barrow for the week. And next week we go to Hawaii. I'm ready for some time alone with Jake. We're seriously considering putting it at the top of our dream sheet for next year. This trip will help us make the final decision. The dream sheet is due on September 1st. Though we won't know until next Feb/March time where we'll be going.

Jacob has been studying up a storm this summer. He's trying to finish Algebra and a Physics class before he leaves next month for Elevation. Then school starts again. He's also trying to get the approval for his Eagle project. His proposal is to spruce up a recreation area near one of the beaches here. In fact, it's at one of the places we went to do your pictures when you were here. High School swimming starts next month too. Dang, the boy is gonna be busy. His busiest year yet, especially with him graduating next summer.

Josh turned 11 last month.

He's still growing at a crazy rapid pace. He'll be passing me by in height shortly. He got a bow and arrows for his birthday and is on cloud nine. But more importantly, he's excited to be a Boy Scout now. He has his first overnight campout next month and can't contain his excitement. He can recite the Scout Oath and Law with conviction. He puts on his uniform with such pride it makes my heart happy.

He's excited about our trip to Washington D.C. the end of September. It's going to be a fantastic experience. He's saved the money he needed and now he's ready to go. He's starting on his Citizenship in the Nation merit badge before we go too.

And then there's Sam. He's still quiet and shy, unless you get to know him. He's so crazy smart. He's really into figuring out how things work. We have a physics kit that has all kinds of pulleys and axels and who knows what else is in there and he'll spend all kinds of time figuring out how to make things move and work.

The kids all got bikes a couple weeks ago and we've been going on family bike rides. Miss B sits up front on Jake's bike and is in heaven. We really have a great time. We've spent all our time just riding around base and on the peninsula though. Jake is nervous about taking the boys out on the main roads. I told him we need to figure it out if we're going to take the kids across the country!!

Miss B? She's still the cutest thing ever. She charms us all daily. We honestly could just sit for hours and talk with her. And often times we do. Today the boys were teaching her to say No Way Jose! It sounded like No Way House!

Today was Week 7 of the 52 Dresses project. I'm loving it. And it gets us to church. Because if I'm already getting her up and dressed, we may as well all go. Is that bad?

Did you see the pictures that I did of that tea party I was planning for her? The one that Elizabeth bought all the stuff for me? Click here and you can see them. We had so much fun doing these pictures. The boys thought it was a hoot. Lots of the glass stuff Elizabeth sent me broke in transit :( and so I ended up using the kids' tea cups. It added a special touch that I just loved.

I've been busy with Simply b. I've got quite a few workshops lined up over the next couple months. They are my favorite thing to do. I would teach every weekend if there was a market for it! I'm working on putting together an advanced class for those who have already taken my first class and are looking for a little more. I've been toying with the idea for a while, but it seems like it's time to start moving in that direction. I may also do some one on one mentoring for those who might want to go that way too.

Although it's only July, I'm already projecting to next year. The rest of this year is full and I'm thinking to when we'll be heading on a new adventure next summer. I'm excited. I don't do well pinned down for so long. I think that is much of what is causing my angst. I'm ready for a change. Big time.

Love you. Hope you are doing good. Write back soon. We can't wait to hear about more of your adventures. Oh! And Mom? I want to tell you about pinterest.com. You will love everything about it. It's the perfect website for you. I think I'll set you up an account and start filling boards for you. You have no idea how much you will be addicted. I don't know if you can do it on your mission or not though. But I hope so.

Who needs Hawaii?

2011-07-20T21:37:00.008-08:00

If winter came early and it started snowing tomorrow, I'd be content with the summer we've just had. I realize it's only July, but I'm not accustomed to warm (64*) days and bright sunny skies for so many days in a row. My vitamin D stores are overflowing. Maybe I shouldn't be even talking about this. I don't want to jinx anything. But Boy Howdy! We've been blessed with great weather.

Yesterday we took the kiddos to the beach. When the tide is out, it's a bonafide beach. With soft sand and everything.

Friends of ours were out for the day too, and the kids were in heaven.

The water was freezing, but they didn't mind. We warned them to beware of the jellyfish that lurk our beaches. I was mentally preparing what I was going to do when they all came streaming out of the water with jellyfish hanging from their limbs. Does pee work on a jellyfish sting? I was making sure I was hydrated just in case.

I'm not sure what their plan was for the log, but I'm sure there was a plan... a well conceived plan. Just look at them. You know they knew exactly what they were doing.

Josh and Colton. Colton and his mom are going to Washington D.C. with Josh and I this fall. It's going to be a rockin' trip! (A rockin' educational, merit badge earning, trip!)

That's a C-130 doing a fly-by. Dang, that's a good lookin' plane! {But it's even hotter when Jake is at the controls.}

Miss B loved everything about the beach. She walked up and down the surf holding her daddy's hand. She splashed and kicked the water and laughed when the waves bumped her knees. Her diaper weighed a gazillion pounds by the time she was done squatting in the water as I had forgotten to get a swim diaper.

And then she realized that her feet were covered in mud and that was the end of that. She had a total meltdown. A screaming-get this hat AND swimsuit AND diaper OFF ME NOW!!! - fit.

And so we stripped her down. And she was fine. For a while. Until she begged us to take her home and put her down for a nap (sign language included - it's really the cutest thing ever).

And so we did. We left just two short hours after we arrived, but it was the perfect excursion and we can't wait to go back. (If it's not pouring buckets - or snowing - for the rest of the summer.)

And by the way... We still need Hawaii! 12 more days.

Week 6 {52 Dresses}

2011-07-19T22:33:00.002-08:00

Of all the weeks so far, I love this week's picture the best.

When I started this project, I knew there would be weeks I was gone or that Miss B wasn't feeling well or that we went camping or any other scenario that involved Miss B not wearing a dress. I figured we'd work around them.

This week was one such week. (Last week was too as I was sick and we stayed home from church.) This weekend I was in Anchorage teaching The Day With Amy Photography Workshop in Palmer. AND Miss B was sick. She had a fever all weekend from the night before I left until the evening I got home.

Jake figured he could do the pictures himself. He assigned Josh the task of picking out her clothes, while he figured out her hair and the camera.

They did a fantastic job.

This picture tells the story of a competent daddy and brothers who can step up while mom is gone. I chose this one out of the many they took, because she was so obviously distressed at the ceremony and didn't want to be bothered while she didn't feel well.

I figured I'd share some of the behind the scenes pics as well.

*Daddy calling to double check on the appropriate camera settings for the picture.

*Josh takes fantastic photos. I love his perspective here. (And his creativity in using Curious George to get her to sit still.

Ready to go home.

2011-07-17T12:38:00.002-08:00

Flashback of sweet Miss B. She's doing what I'd like to be doing. I'm tired and can't stop yawning. This week has been a series of late nights and early mornings. Now I'm sitting in the Anchorage airport waiting for my flight back to Kodiak. It boards in an hour. I was here only 48 hours, not nearly long enough to accomplish the to-do list I had.

I'm looking forward to a nap when I get home today. Maybe Miss B will take one with me. She hasn't been feeling well. When I left Friday morning she was running a fever. Jake said it's been coming and going all weekend and she's been a little ornery. He took pictures today for Week 6 {52 Dresses}. I can't wait to see them!

I hope Miss B is feeling better tomorrow. I have big plans for a photoshoot with her and the boys tomorrow. Cakes and cupcakes and tea parties. I hope it turns out as amazing as I imagine it in my mind.

The Day with Amy Photography Workshop yesterday was fantastic. The host is a friend I've known for 19 years. We don't see each other very often, but when we do we catch up as if no time has passed at all. Don't you love friends like that? Her home was the perfect location for the workshop. And her husband took their children to a hotel for the night and kept them out all day so she didn't have to worry. Seriously sweet husband. Jake would do something like that. My friend and I? We're lucky ducks.

Week 5 {52 Dresses}

2011-07-11T00:14:00.001-08:00

Riding with the big boys.

2011-07-09T22:34:00.003-08:00

I think these images speak for themselves. Right?

Plus, I'm too tired to come up with something witty. I think I'm getting sick. My head hurts, my ears hurt and my throat hurt. I'm going to take a Nyquil and go to bed.

Alternative Modes of Transportation

2011-07-08T23:34:00.007-08:00

I'm excited for tomorrow, except for the part where Jake has duty.

Wait, let me back up a little...

The other day Jake went fishing with a friend. They spent the night out at a remote camp in a tent surrounded by an electric fence to protect them from the bears... like this one. Jake said the bear was too interested in the salmon to care about him taking pictures. All I could think of was this video. And I'm glad I take pictures of newborn babies and not bears.

They woke before dawn to beat the other anglers and caught their limit within a couple hours. After the fantastic time Jake had, I can say with ease that if we weren't leaving next year we'd now be the owners of our own electric fence to keep the bears out (as well as an off-road vehicle to get us to the prime fishing/camping locations). He's disappointed we didn't discover it earlier. Me? Not so much. But I do hope he and the boys have the chance to make it out again this year. (That's a huge hint to Audrey and Jana - my friends who own said off-road vehicles.)

We don't know where we'll be headed next year. Right now we think it's between Hawaii and Sacramento, but that's just an educated guess and those don't really apply when it comes to the Coast Guard. Jake will turn in a dream sheet by September 1st that will rank his preference for PCS (permanent change of station) locations. We're going to Hawaii next month to see where it should be ranked. I know. It's rough, but somebody has to do it. We should know by next February where we'll be moving next summer.

Though I could be wrong, I don't imagine electric fences and off-road utility vehicles are the best investment when we may be headed to Oahu for four years. Josh is devastated. There isn't much he would love more in this world than a four-wheeler of some sort. He has been hoping against hope that we'd end up with one.

Instead we went with the pedal power mode of transportation. Remember this post? This brings me back to why I'm looking forward to tomorrow.

Tonight we took the boys and they each got a new bike. Miss B even got one! As Tim (the bike store owner) rang us up he told us that the family that bikes together - stays together. And it seems like a much more logical idea considering the possible locations for our upcoming PCS.

I still have big plans for an EPIC! Adventure with my family. I'm going to keep talking about it and in my mind these bikes bring us that much closer to it. Speaking it into existence, if you will. (Though I'm not sure how far Miss B will get on an Epic! Adventure with her balance bike. Pictures to come tomorrow.)

In the meantime, Tomorrow I'm going to teach Sam how to switch gears on his new bike. And I'll go on a bike ride with Josh. He asked if he could wake me up early to go, but he's not such an early riser. So I think I'll still get some decent sleep.

If it's not soaking rain on Monday (though maybe even if it is) we're going to head out on a real family bike ride. Can't wait!

*A random picture because B's pig tails are so dang cute!

P.S. As I was typing this the house is all quiet and everyone is sleeping. But then I heard Josh yell from his bedroom, DUDE! Stop! Get down from there! And then he came rushing out into the hallway. He stopped and looked around when I called his name and then he woke up disoriented. He's always talked in his sleep, but that's the first time he's actually gotten out of bed. Nervy. (Evidently he was dreaming that Sam was climbing up a wall.)

Goodnight.

Lazy

2011-07-08T10:16:00.000-08:00

It's 10:11am and I'm still in bed. This is my idea of a vacation! Although I'm not on vacation. I'm at home. But it's Friday and other than a quick picture I need to take this afternoon I have nothing I have to do today. That doesn't mean that I don't have a TON on my to-do list, but there isn't anything that can't wait for a bit while I relax.

I've been browsing Pinterest. It's like a vacation all by itself! I can get lost in images over there. If you haven't been there, you definitely need to go check it out!

Also!! I have a new website design over at Simply b Photos. Check it out and tell me what you think. My awesome neighbor Courtney has been working on it for me. I love it! I'm doing a great big giveaway, so if you'd like to win a copy of my workshop workbook... go enter!! Plus, I'd love for you to pass the word around! Especially if you know someone in Hawaii or Sacramento who would like to go to my workshop! (I'm giving away seats to my workshop there too!)

Jake and I leave for Hawaii in 25 days. It's not like I'm counting down or anything. Except... i am. Totally.

Flashback

2011-07-05T22:51:00.004-08:00

While cleaning up unpublished posts I found this little jewel left over from last October.

And this one from last June...

Harvest

2011-07-05T22:42:00.000-08:00

Week 4 {52 Dresses}

2011-07-05T22:37:00.000-08:00

Hippo Crossing

2011-06-26T18:40:00.003-08:00

I just got off the phone with my mom. And now I want to cry. I guess I just realized how far away she is. I'm excited for them and I miss them. It was a short conversation, but she wanted to give us a quick update on how they are doing. They are getting a new mission president and so there is a lot of change going on. They are going to be working in the mission office. Dad is in charge of the computers and a couple other things (which I can't remember right now) and Mom is in charge of the housing for the mission. She sounded slightly distressed that she will have to use a computer.

The couple they are replacing has been showing them the ropes. They went out on a drive this weekend and saw baboons and a hippopotamus! We have deer crossing signs here, they have watch for hippo signs there. It's cold and their little flat doesn't have heat or insulation. I can imagine my mom constantly wrapped in a blanket whenever they are home. She's always cold. A trait I share with her.

It may be winter in South Africa but we're having a Kodiak summer here. Mostly cloudy and cold with a few gorgeous sunshiny days mixed in. They boys found this Little Tykes play gym by the dumpster. They love it... another's trash and all that.

36 days to Hawaii. You would not even believe the excitement I feel. Vacation, just me and my sweetie.

Week 3 {52 Dresses}

2011-06-26T18:34:00.002-08:00

Shortly after taking these pictures, while hurrying out the door to church, Miss B slipped and fell into the mud! We got her cleaned up from that and during church she cut her mouth and bled ALL over. By the time we got home, she was exhausted and ready for a nap and so I didn't get the "After" picture. Bummer. Dress from J.Marie Designs!

Sam-A-Lam

2011-06-24T11:23:00.004-08:00

Do you miss seeing pictures of Mr. Sam-a-lam? I know I miss taking them. He's been busy in summer mode. You know what I mean, don't you? Gone for hours at a time, with a dash in for a drink or a snack or a question before quickly disappearing again. He's got some pink on his cheeks which is a welcome site. After the long gloomy winter we all resemble halibut.

He needs a haircut. I've been meaning to get to it, but haven't yet. For a while it was cute. He would flip his hair and he looked like a little Justin Bieber. But it's past that stage and now I miss seeing into his eyes.

This picture is for you Grandma and Grandpa. We're glad you made it safe to Johannesburg and hope that the next 5 weeks in your temporary housing go quickly. We can't wait till you're hooked up to the world wide web and we can Skype. Our prayers are with you and we miss you.

Doesn't it look like he has a small cleft in his chin? Since he was a baby he's had just a glimmer of one if we get him in the right light. I hoped one of our children would get that trait passed down from Grandpa Oborn through me. I used to get a lot of attention for my cleft. In 5th grade I would squeeze my chin together to make sure it didn't go away. Maybe I should have Sam start squeezing.

Zip

2011-06-22T17:46:00.002-08:00

I miss writing. It's like exercise; if you don't use the muscles, you lose them. I've lost my writing muscles, the same way I've lost all the rest of the muscles in my body. The last year has done a number on me. Physically, spiritually, emotionally.

2010/2011 will go down as a tough year, if I could I'd ask for a do-over. I'd do things differently. My priorities would be different. I'd make sure I continued working out and putting focus on my physical health rather than letting it slide (or avalanche downhill).

I miss my friend Dani who came to my house every morning at 5:30 am to take me to the gym. I miss feeling comfortable in my skin. I miss feeling happy and content and squared away.

I've been back to the gym 5 out of the last 6 days and it has kicked my butt. My body is reeling and trying to figure out what I'm doing to it. But I'm determined. I've got those 100 pounds to lose, remember? My sister said I'll make a fortune if I pull it off and actually lose 100 pounds in the next 40 days. I'll let you know how it goes.

But I'm doing it. Drawing a line in the sand and all that.

The other day I was talking to a friend of mine who is attending Weight Watchers with me. We conversed about the challenges and trials that we face during our lives. We concluded that weight was a challenge we'd rather not have. We'd prefer to be one of the naturally thin people. Their lives look so easy. And really, who wants to carry their trials on their hips for the world to see?

As soon as the wish escaped my lips I took it back. I don't want someone else's challenges and trials. I know I can overcome mine. It may take a while, probably more than 40 days, but I know I can do it. I've done it before. It's more than being thin. It's about health and activity and feeling comfortable in my skin. When I'm heavy, I avoid doing things that I would readily do if I was thin. I would prefer to hide, shamed of my physique and of my missing self control. I feel as if everyone is talking about me and wondering why I just don't eat less.

There. I said it. I laid it out bare for you to read. Because I'm ready to do something about it. As I type this I'm afraid you are saying, "Again? Didn't you just go through all this and fail?" And yes, I did. A dozen times. Or more. But I refuse to let my weight and my body define me. I am not my body.

I'm going to continue going to the gym. I'll lift my weights in the same room as all those big, bulky, sweaty men who grunt during their reps. It's only slightly humiliating. I'll log miles on the elliptical and make new playlists to motivate me to pick up the pace.

I'm going to eat less. And what I eat will be healthier.

Because those are my challenges. And they aren't small or easy and I wear them for the world to see. But I'll take them and I'll rise to the challenge. Because I don't know what your challenges are, but I don't want them. Thank you very much.

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And what good with a blog post be without some pics of Miss B? She's a feisty one. She puts her boots on all by herself, her jacket too (although it may be upside down and backwards). She's gaining her independence one skill at a time. Currently she's working on her zip technique. It is still lacking a bit in its execution. Good thing she has brothers around to help out.

Mid-Air

2011-06-19T20:20:00.003-08:00

We spent Father's Day without a father. It was kindof a downer. On the upside, our oldest son returned after a couple weeks in Utah. They passed each other on their respective flights somewhere over Southeast Alaska.

It's good to have Jacob home, we missed him. Friday night Sam was camping with his friend's family and Josh was at a birthday party. That left Miss B, Jake and I. We had dinner with friends. It was odd not having the boys around. Lonely.

Next week we'll all be together again. Looking forward to it.

Miss B was excited to see her big brother. She still can't pronounce his name properly. It sounds like Day-Bub.

Time for me to get ready for bed. I'm getting up early to workout in the morning. Mr. Earle and I are going to Hawaii in six weeks. Just me and him. I'm going to try and lose 100 pounds. That's only 16 pounds per week. 2.3 pounds per day. Doesn't sound too tough.

52 Dresses ~ Week 2

2011-06-19T19:59:00.002-08:00

Josh kept telling me to take Miss B's bink out when I was taking these pictures. I didn't want to. It's too much of who she is right now. I've been thinking about weaning her from it and lots of well meaning friends have giving me plenty of advice on how to do it. I'm not ready yet. She'll grow up soon enough.

Her great big smile cracks me up. She was actually screaming (shrieking?) here. She does it well.

My friend suggested I tell you where I got the dresses too. I got this one from Zulily.com. Love them!

52 Dresses ~ Week 1

2011-06-12T19:24:00.003-08:00

I love buying dresses for Miss B. But our lifestyle in Kodiak is such that she typically only wears them on Sunday, which means she's never worn the same dress to church twice. Each Sunday I think about how cute it would be to document her in her darling dresses each week.

I've had this idea for a while now, over a year I suppose. But then Miss B turned two and it changed everything. She growing up, she's changing. It was the extra umph I needed to get started.

I'm not promising she'll never wear a dress twice over the next 52 weeks. I'm just saying it's improbable.

Here's the first week of my latest project... 52 Dresses.

Cookie Monsters

2011-06-12T18:12:00.009-08:00

It's been raining for days. The kids are beginning to go stir crazy. Sam's friend came over to visit and Sam wanted to play games on the computer. My response? Absolutely not. I'm not a fan of kids on the computer. It drives me crazy. Sam was frustrated because there wasn't anything to do!

I suggested they make cookies... all by themselves. Turns out that was a pretty good idea. They were thrilled and did a fantastic job. The cookies were yummy!

While I was taking these pictures, Sam's friend would look at me and smile. Sam said You don't have to smile. My mom likes to take pictures. She just wants you to do what you are doing. She says she is capturing moments.

He's a smart one, that Sam is. And he makes me smile.

Grandma and Grandpa enter the MTC

2011-06-12T14:27:00.003-08:00

My dad sent us an email this morning summarizing their first week at the Missionary Training Center. I started to read it aloud to the family at the breakfast table but Jake had to finish because I couldn't read through my tears. There isn't any particular reason I was crying. I think I was just overwhelmed at the reality of them leaving. I'm so proud and excited for them. I know that what they are doing is completely out of their comfort zone, particularly for my mom. I can only imagine how stressful this week was for her.

Mom... I'm proud of you!!! Dad, I loved the letter. It was perfect!

My parents have been part of the lives of so many of my friends. I thought you might like to read about the experiences they have over the next couple years, so I'll share them here with you.

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Well it is official, we are now missionaries. You know -- the ones that walk around with big smiles and Black and White Badges on their chests.

We were set apart by President Gilbert, of Becky an Ray's Stake. Since we arrived in Utah the Lakeview Stake has been our official “home away from home”. Becky's ward has been very welcoming and supportive. When our “call letter” arrived in March, we received permission from our
Alaskan Stake President to have President Gilbert set us apart. That took place Sunday night. Becky, Elizabeth and Megan's family were on hand, AND as a special treat Lauran and Jacob were also there.

On Monday morning we were both nervous, with grandma just a little more so. We reported to the MTC at 10am, in Ben's little blue Saturn. It was so nice of him to allow us to use it while we are here. I think it's cute. It is a stick shift and needs a paint job, but it works great and gets about 35 mpg. It does tent to “screech” when we first start it and grandma worries that it will “screech” in the MTC parking lot when the other missionaries are in the lot with us. Most of them are driving “big expensive looking” cars. Like Cadillacs, Lexus, Buicks etc. You get the picture. However, once inside the MTC we looked just like everyone else (except I think grandma is a lot cuter than the other sisters) so we fit right in.

While Monday was actually our shortest day (starting at 10 and ending about 3), we were sure tired when we got back to Becky's. Consider this:

When we arrived at 10am we were directed from the parking lot through a small door into the main building. Once inside we stood in-line in a very small hallway, waiting to enter a small room where there were three different "sisters" that checked us in. One of the sisters reviewed our medical (shot) records and gave us two slips of paper. One paper told us to go to a particular room on Wednesday at 4pm for a shot and the other told us to go to a special room on Tuesday at 3pm to meet with a doctor to learn about "malaria" (more about this later).

Then we were moved to another room across the hall where another sister reviewed our "packet"
that we had been given in the previous room and again explained what was in it, including the campus map (the directions we were given by those two sweet sisters were quite different). From there we crossed the hall to another room and had our pictures taken. Then back to the first room to met the MTC director and his wife (Elder and Sister Stock). Then off to the Book Store to pick up our "badges and packet"

We spent Monday in a state of shock! We had no idea what was coming next. We were assigned to "a district" consisting of four couples, the husband of one couple was assigned as our "district leader". Then we met our "teachers", Young returned missionaries that work as Employees at the MTC (not to be confused with the Volunteers OR with the Leaders that were called and set apart OR with the Staff)

There were literally thousands of young elders and sister missionaries at the MTC while we were there. They were from all over the world and many counties. We heard many conversations in many different languages and we were moved to tears when we mingled among them because the spirit of the Lord was so strong. We visited the book store where we could purchase not only books but combs, toothbrushes, snacks and toys.

Right next to the bookstore was a "mail room" where we were assigned a "mailbox" (box 40). It was great fun walking hand in hand and just looking around.

We were only at the MTC for 6 hours with a whole hour for lunch and "15 min breaks" every hour. But once it was over and we got back to Becky's we still had “homework” and stayed up late to get ready for Tuesday.

On Tuesday we knew a lot more about the MTC, in fact Grandma miraculously seemed to know where we were going. I was impressed. We spent the day going from the "large classroom" where we met with the entire "Senior Missionary Group" of 38 couples to the "small classroom" where we met with our district and Sister Rodriguez and studied and practiced. And then back again. The sessions lasted about 45 min with a 15 min break to travel to the next class room. At 3pm we went with several other couples to meet with the Doctor and get the "malaria" talk.

I found it interestingly, Grandma found it terrifying. She came out of the room crying and could not stop. I admit, I didn't understand and could do little to comfort her. We spent the next 30 minutes trying to be inconspicuous and not draw attention. We have subsequently e-mailed our Mission President and have been told not to worry about it where we will be living there is no danger.

Tuesday night was very special because a member of the 1st quorum of 70 addressed us. The auditorium was filled to the brim with over 2000 missionaries. The spirit was very strong and tears came easily. But is was also very exhausting, so we were “dog tired” as we crawled into Becky's living room. “Was it that bad?” Becky exclaimed, when she saw us.

Wednesday started at 8am, also. We had more homework and spent the day listing to lectures in the “large meeting room” alternating with class time doing “role playing” in the small class rooms. Just before lunch we had the exciting opportunity to give a lesson (first discussion) to an “investigator” in a small room that was decorated like a sitting room in a home. It also contained video cameras so our “instructor” could watch us and tell us what we did wrong or right.

We were really worried we would not do it right, but in the end it was actually fun. We couldn't find out how our instructor felt we did because she was monitoring four separate rooms. She told us that by the time she had tuned into our room, it was empty. (I guess we did it too fast, but he investigator seemed to enjoy it and agreed to read the committed to read the B of M and set up a follow up appointment, had a closing prayer and left the room.

So she said since she missed it, we would have to tell her how we did. We told her we did great, and we deserved an “A”.

Thursday was much better, not that it was easier, but that the stress level decreased and the spirit was much more supportive. On Friday we were able to leave the campus at lunch time and spend it with the McKimmey's and the Love's at "seven peaks", a wonderful water park for kids.

Grandma and I are so grateful for the support of our family and friends that are making it possible for us to serve this mission. We know that we are going to a land where the Lord wants us and that he will use us for an important work.

Thank you!!

Grandma and Grandpa

Coming Attractions

2011-06-09T00:04:00.016-08:00

In six months I'm going to be printing the 2011 blog book as a piece of our family history. I don't want it to be empty.

Plus, my parents entered the Missionary Training Center in Provo, Utah on Monday. They leave in less than two weeks for South Africa for two years. In between Skype chats, they'll be catching up with us through the blog. I don't want to disappoint them and I certainly don't want them to miss out on anything.

It's a call to action, I tell you!

I miss this guy! He's in Utah right now and there is a void in our home when he is gone. (His brothers like to sleep in his room while he's out of town.) He's grown up so quickly. He'll graduate from high school next year. He'll be 16. He has big plans and I couldn't be more proud.

Jake and I were talking about our plans today, our future. It's a common subject. We like to talk. My favorite thing in the world is to sit and talk with him. We can talk for hours. During our conversation today we were discussing where we will be when Jacob gets home from his mission in five and a half years. That time will be here before we know it. And if he's anything like his father (which he is), he'll be moving on with his life. He'll be getting married and moving away and starting his own path. That's difficult to think about.

It's important to us to have as much family time as we can. There is such a big gap between Jacob and Miss B. She'll be three when he graduates from high school and only four when he heads out into the world for college (no way is he leaving home at 16!) and then soon after that for a mission.

We took the family camping over Memorial Day weekend. We rented a camper from the base and had the best time. Josh made his infamous Woofums video and we stayed up late talking with friends who were staying at a neighboring campsite. Jake drove Miss B and I home to sleep in our own beds when it became apparent that she was not going to be able to sleep there. (I see my sisters rolling their eyes while they read this. Yes, Miss B runs the show around here.)

Isn't it nice that over Memorial Day weekend we are all wearing hoodies and jackets? That's typical summer attire around here.

Our neighbors came and had dinner with us. Their son has a crush on Miss B. She's used to the adoration and willingly gives out hugs and kisses.

Miss B loved everything about the campsite. She loved the freedom to run and climb and scare the daylights out of me when she got too close to the campfire.

She's a copycat. She has a fascination with the computer. Monkey see... Monkey do.

Have you seen these? I can't remember if I've posted them before and I'm too tired to go back and check...

She can work the mouse like a pro.

This is my view almost daily when her daddy comes home for lunch. She'll climb on his lap and is perfectly content, especially if there happens to be an iPhone handy. She's a tech savvy little girl. And she has her daddy wrapped around her finger.

I took this picture on her birthday last week. It was a non-event. I have big plans, but haven't preceded to the execution stage yet. Soon, when all the Earles are back under one roof, she can officially turn two. And by officially, I mean it will be photo documented.

When did she get so big? I honestly believe it was only days ago that we were laying her naked bum out to dry a diaper rash and to fight bilirubin.

We moved our house around. We're finally using all our space efficiently and I love it. It also gives Miss B access to the back yard as she's never known before. She's a fan.

She's an angel.

Most of the time.

She gave us a scare the other day. She turned two on Wednesday June 1st. On Thursday, June 2nd and Friday, June 3rd she was a Holy Terror. I'm not even exaggerating. She spent both days ~~saying~~ shrieking, Stoooooooooooop. Noooooooooo. Doooooooooont. We were stunned. At first we laughed and then we realized that if this behavior continued, we were in trouble. Her brothers kept pointing out that now she is TWO, as in the Terrible Twos. They were convinced that her behavior was a direct result of her birthday.

Her daddy was more shocked than any of the rest of us. Where did my angel go? He asked her in disbelief. (He even spanked her, which he's never done before.)

Saturday she still had some piss and vinegar left in her system, but by Sunday she was back to normal. She even sat all the way through Sacrament Meeting at church.

Weird.

I'm not sure what her problem was, but I hope it wasn't a preview of coming attractions.

Hi. My name is Amy.

2011-06-08T14:14:00.002-08:00

This blog is not dead. I promise. I just took a sabbatical. Can you take a sabbatical from a blog? I say you can. And I did.

I had breakfast with Miss B this morning. She turned two last week. Two. YEARS. I'm so sad. I honestly don't want her to grow up.

But seriously? How cute is she?

I feel the need to catch you up on what has been happening in the Earle home the last few months. We've been busy. We're still in Kodiak. Jake still flies C-130 for the Coast Guard. I'm still running Simply b Photos. We still homeschool. The basics remain the same.

We've been traveling like crazy. I taught a Day With Amy Photography Workshop in Palmer in April and North Pole in May.

Jake and Miss B came with me to North Pole. That whole week deserves a blog post of it's own. But I'll give you the Reader's Digest Version. My nephew Andrew came and stayed with the boys while we were gone. They partied the whole week. It was good for them. We had gorgeous weather in Fairbanks. It was fantastic to catch up with old friends and meet new ones. BFF Kim and I picked up right where we left off. She's the kind of friend that no matter how much time passes, it's like no time at all. And I love her family. I'd move back to Fairbanks just to live near them again.

Jacob, Miss B and I were in Utah the end of April. Jacob attended Elevation with Williamsburg Academy and I was there for photography. Jacob is back in Utah this month attending EFY (Especially for Youth) and BYU's Swim Camp. He's in heaven.

The boys are back to their entrepreneurial selves. They've been washing windows, mowing lawns, and selling Woofum sticks. Josh is about halfway to his goal for his trip to Washington D.C. this fall.

And of course, Miss B continues to charm us all and is the center of our world.

Woofums!

2011-05-29T15:10:00.001-08:00

Hi.

2011-05-20T22:56:00.002-08:00

We are in Fairbanks.

Tomorrow I'm teaching a Day with Amy Photography Workshop. I'm giddy with excitement! I just read through my workbook and reviewed my presentation. I love teaching. If I had to choose between taking pictures and teaching about taking pictures, it would be a hard choice.

I thought we would have lots of time while we were here. We'd relax and write inventories and visit with friends. But the time is slipping through my fingers. We had dinner with an old friend tonight. We haven't seen her in 2 years, and it was if no time had passed. I love friends like that. I count them as some of my favorite blessings.

It's weird to be back Up North. The mosquitos are bigger than I remembered. It's warmer than I remembered. And there is more to do than I remembered. It seems Kodiak has tempered me.

We're talking about moving back here and what that would look like. The friends we have take much of the apprehension out of it.

Today is Juanita's birthday. She would have been 13 years old. Two years ago I reminisced on her birth while I was anticipating the birth of Miss B.

Miss B is sunshine to my soul. I never knew how much I would love having a daughter.

Today she and I had lunch together. We went to a cafe downtown. She wore her party skirt and frilly socks. We ordered soup and sandwiches. I had the turkey and provolone and she had grilled cheese. Afterward we took a walk in the sunshine. She held my hand and pointed out each birdie she saw. Her blond curls blew in the breeze and I thanked my Heavenly Father for sharing her with me.

God Be With You Till We Meet Again

2011-05-07T10:01:00.006-08:00

My trip to Utah was a blur. Seven days, six nights that were filled to overflowing. I wish I could have stayed longer. I should have stayed longer. Now I'm home and when I think about it, it's all a little fuzzy.

I mostly remember my goodbye to my mom and dad. We were in Becky's living room. My bags already packed and in the car. Miss B perched on my hip. Keys in my hand. Ready to go. And then it hit me.

I wasn't going to see them again for over two years.

I don't cry at goodbyes. But I did last Sunday. And I think I'll cry again right now just thinking about it.

My mom and dad are moving to South Africa for two years to share the Gospel of Jesus Christ (as missionaries for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints) with those who live there. When I think of the sacrifice that entails, my heart bursts with pride. My parents are leaving what matters most in the world to them. They are leaving their 7 daughters, 3 sons, 7 sons in law, 1 daughter in law (and one soon to be daughter in law), and 35 (soon to be 36) grandchildren behind to go serve the Lord.

My mom is scared silly. Who wouldn't be? My dad is her rock. They have each other and they are going to do amazing things. The Lord loves them and he will bless our family because of their service. I have absolutely no doubt of that.

But I'm going to miss them. They go to the MTC (Missionary Training Center) on June 6th. I'm going to miss the random texts from my dad. And the ability to call them anytime to ask advice or share my triumphs or disappointments. I'm already scheming on what it would take to visit Johannesburg in the next couple years. It should be easy other than the excessive cost of airline tickets.

My friend's parents just returned from their mission this week. I remember when they left and it didn't seem that long ago. So... here's hoping my parent's time goes just as quickly and that they love and embrace every minute of it.

Thank you Mom and Dad. Thank you for your example to all of us, especially to me and my children. Thank you for serving the Lord in spite of all the reasons why it would be easier not to. Thank you for facing your fears and relying on faith. Your strength, courage, and faith buoys me. I love you.

Joyful

2011-04-17T22:49:00.002-08:00

It's time for bed again.

And I'm blogging.

Miss B and I watched her daddy's plane land today. We have a nice view of the airport runway from our back porch. She's obsessed with "pwanes and copters", which we have a lot of around here. Her ears perk and her eyes light up when she hears them and the signing begins. "Pwane! Pwane! Pwane!" "Copter, Copter, Copter!!" It's pretty much the cutest thing you've ever seen.

I ordered Miss B the cutest dress from Joyfolie. I had to try it out with my 85mm lens. And I love the results.

One week till Utah. I'm getting excited. And nervous. But mostly excited.

My Son

2011-04-15T13:54:00.000-08:00

Personal Leadership Project from Jacob Earle on Vimeo.

I should just go to bed and start this over in the morning.

2011-04-12T22:52:00.005-08:00

Photography is an expensive hobby. Everything costs $200. Unless it costs $500. And I'm only talking about the supporting roles. The leading ladies are much, much more expensive. But they are worth it.

I've been drooling over this new lens for months. Before that I never even knew I needed it. Only six months ago I purchased my two dream portrait lenses (the Nikon 24-70 2.8 and the Nikon 50 1.4G ~ incase you were wondering) and the ultimate camera body (the Nikon D700). I still love them (I use the 50mm 1.4 80% of the time), but then I heard about this new lens (the Nikon 85mm 1.4G). Suddenly I had to have it. Every review I read absolutely raved about it.

It's crazy expensive and so I put it off. And put it off again. And then Japan had that terrible, tragic earthquake. Every available lens was snatched up (at double the cost... I'm not even joking about that). I couldn't find one anywhere, not with a USA warranty at least. I could find grey market lenses, but I'm not so sure about them. That's only shades away from black. Sounds sketchy.

I resigned to the fact that it might be a while before Nikon produces more, and I would have to do without.

I'm leaving in 11 days for Utah. I'm attending a child/newborn photography workshop and having some one-on-one mentoring with one of my favorite photographers. I contacted a lens rental company (did you know there was such a thing?!) and made arrangements to rent the lens for the week I was there.

At my workshop this weekend in Palmer (which was absolutely amazing) someone suggested I look at Stewarts Camera in Anchorage. I was dubious, but Monday afternoon I decided it was worth a try. I was astonished when they said they had one more in stock (at the regular price even!). He mentioned that it would probably be a while before they get more. I bought it on the spot. He must have rushed it to the post office because less than 24 hours later, the mailman rang my doorbell holding several packages (including new tshirts for Jake and aviator glasses for Jacob), one of which was my new lens.

I'm in love.

I shouldn't be in love with inanimate objects, but I am. This lens is worth all the hype. It's just lovely. That picture at the top is the first picture I snapped with it and it makes me smile. That is Jacob's completely natural smile. I don't remember what I said to him to get the laugh, but I'm glad I did.

I know, it's boring to read this photography stuff. But this is really big news. I went immediately downstairs and took some pictures of Miss B and Sam in their clothes from J. Marie Designs. I've got a few more pics to take of Miss B, but she was ready for a nap and not interested in pictures.

I know I'm going to read this post in the morning and remember that I shouldn't blog so late at night. But I'm going to publish it anyways.

And here's some pics of my sweeties...

*Sigh* I love this little boy. How could I resist his absolute perfection? He has my heart.

Weekend Rain

2011-04-07T00:06:00.002-08:00

It's 12:07am and I cannot blog without a picture. I cannot. That is very frustrating to me. Because I also cannot blog on my desktop. I can only blog on my laptop. (It's a thing.) But all my pictures are on my desktop. And so I have to go through the process of uploading them from the desktop and then switching over to the laptop.

It is a pain in the butt.

Blogging shouldn't be a pain in the arse. It should be pleasant and enjoyable.

Alas.

It rained all weekend. It wasn't the drizzle kind of rain. It was the soaking, blowing sideways, the sky is so angry, kind of rain.

Which was a good thing.

Because it was General Conference weekend. Twice a year members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints gather to hear from our Prophet and Apostles and General Authorities of the church. They speak to a group of over 21,000 in a large conference center in Salt Lake City and the meetings are broadcast all over the world via the internet. There are 5 sessions each April and October. Three on Saturday and two on Sunday. Each lasts two hours. Each has different speakers.

When I was a little girl, we used to have to go to the church building to watch conference. It was projected on a big screen and the lights were dimmed. We sang along with the Mormon Tabernacle Choir and waited patiently for the Prophet to speak. (That's how I would like to remember it. But really we were poking each other and wiggling and whispering and doodling. I'd rest my head in Tressa's lap and she'd braid my hair. Two hours was an eternity back then.)

These days we can watch conference from our living room. And we did. We watched all the sessions. The rain was a blessing. The doorbell didn't ring. There was no temptation to go out and enjoy the island. We just cuddled on the couch and watched and listened and sang along with the choir.

I like watching from home. You can make yourself a snack when you get hungry. And Sam can play with Legos while he's listening. And Miss B can do whatever it is that she does all day long.

My testimony was strengthened over and over again as I listened to the words which were spoken. I feel so blessed to have the guidance and inspiration of a living prophet on the earth today. I loved to listen to the words of our beloved leaders testifying over and over again that Jesus is the Christ. That he lives. That through him we can receive forgiveness for our sins and gain eternal life.

I made many mini goals and one big goal this weekend. I'm going to read the Book of Mormon this month. I usually read it with the boys and we go chapter by chapter each day. But this time, it's just me, with my focus and my heart and my study. Are you curious about the Book of Mormon? You can learn more about it here.

I'll let you know how my goal is progressing.

And I guess this picture is going to have to wait. Because it's late. And I'm tired. But I'll say this... I love this man.

3rd Generation Dreams

2011-04-01T17:59:00.002-08:00

The Pinewood Derby was last night.

I forgot my camera.

Seriously? Seriously.

Jake and I were a little nervous going into last night. We'd been talking with Sam all week about sportsmanship. We discussed what is really important about the race. Getting to make the cars, race them, have fun and learn to be good sports, etc. During our 10th discussion of the same topic, Sam interjected. I know, but I really want to win. Jacob won his first Pinewood Derby. Josh won his first Pinewood Derby. And I really want to win my first Pinewood Derby.

Jake and I looked at each other. Our thoughts unified. They sounded something like *Gulp*.

Sam had worked hard on his car. With Jake's help he cut it out, painted it and covered it with pirate stickers. He attached the tires and proceeded to spin the wheels with graphite diligently each day. Several times. He kept a chart with how many times he spun each tire. He was dedicated.

The derby was great. 13 boys raced, and there were some fast cars! And really fun designs. Remember Josh's Crunch Car? There was a camouflage tank and Luke Skywalker's Speeder. I was so proud of the boys.

When we woke up this morning we found this on Sam's dresser. His shrine to the Pinewood Derby. His first.

I was so proud of Sam last night. Each time his car won, he just had the smallest smile. His eyes were lit like Christmas trees, but he was humble. I wish I could have caught a picture of the look on his face the first time his car crossed this finish line. Pure Joy.

His car took first place. It never lost a race. It was lightening fast on that track.

I enjoy the Pinewood Derby too. I made ID Cards for each of the boys, along with laminated Pit Passes. And edible Pinewood Derby cars made out of Twinkies with Oreos pasted (with frosting) to the sides.

I'm proud of Sam and his hard work. He's been focused on this race for weeks. I suppose spinning each wheel hundreds of times each day is his secret.

And here's some gratuitous Miss B love. The boys said I can't write a post without talking about her. I suppose they are right, but I'm okay with it. And for now, so is she.

Couch Potato

2011-03-29T18:12:00.005-08:00

We don't have cable. I can't remember the last time we had cable. Actually, we had it briefly in 2004 so we could watch the Olympics in Athens. We thought about getting it in 2008 so we could watch the Beijing Games. But we didn't. We bought bunny ears from Home Depot instead and were able to get enough signal to watch Michael Phelps swim into Olympic history. We considered it again in 2010, but I was annoyed just enough at NBC for not broadcasting via internet that I refused to be blackmailed into ordering cable. And the whole No Bunny Ear law had been passed and so we were out of luck there.

But who needs cable these days? We have Netflix. Although I'm really considering cancelling it. We've had Say Anything floating around the house for six weeks now. I keep meaning to watch it.

We occasionally stop at Blockbuster (we don't have a Redbox - which I hear is really cool!). But not very often.

Mostly, we Hulu. I have a dozen shows I keep my eye on. (Usually late at night when I'm editing.) I'm addicted to Castle, White Collar, Burn Notice, The Chicago Code, NCIS Los Angeles...

Back in the day, we used to buy TV shows on iTunes. We have Smurfs and Scooby Doo, Mythbusters and Weaponology, NASA Missions and The Universe. The kids used to watch them on Jakes iPod (which looks like a brick compared to the new models). It was convenient for traveling and keeping the children occupied. Among the widely varied line-up of television shows we also have two episodes of Disney's Mickey Mouse Clubhouse Season 1. Mickey Goes Fishing and Mickey's Treasure Hunt.

Many mornings when Miss B wakes up (and I'm not ready to get up), Josh brings her downstairs to watch a TV show on the computer. They used to watch Kipper on Netflix, but it turns out that she really, really likes Mickey Mouse Clubhouse. She will sit still for the entire 24 minutes. Poor Josh has both episodes memorized. He can recite them by heart.

When I came down this morning, Miss B was lounging in my desk chair watching Mickey fish. She looked pretty cozy. Josh was in the kitchen making pancakes. I suppose he couldn't stand to watch it one more time.

Epic!

2011-03-29T00:36:00.006-08:00

I've been blogging for three years, during which time I've developed my own style of writing. If you've spent any time with me you know I'm a big fan of fragmented sentences and (...). It's not exactly the Queen's English. (Although I really have no idea what the Queen's English is.) I write the way I hear it in my head.

Jake proofread my Day with Amy Photography Workshop Workbook for me. Evidently I had started every other sentence with the word "But". The other sentences started with the word "And" or "Because".

I don't worry so much about my writing skills on the blog. And that attitude has carried over onto my Simply b Photos blog. But it's come back to haunt me. Last month I did a shoot I called Alaska Grown. Six babies all lined up wearing Alaska Grown onesies. It was adorable and an absolute fun time!! I wrote about it here. The picture and part of the post ended up getting printed on the front page of a local paper. (The Kodiak Shopper) I squealed with delight when I saw it. I seriously was just tickled! But when I read the post in the paper, I realized that people who don't follow my blog will think I have no more than a 5th grade education.

Nice.

But I'm not going to change. And I realize that I do start a lot of my sentences with but. Because I must be a fountain of contradiction.

I just got my blog books in the mail. They include every post I've written since March 2008. I blogged a lot in 2009. Almost 400 pages worth! My kiddos have loved looking through them. Simply seeing all those posts on paper makes me want to blog more. Capture more moments. Tell more stories. Be more present.

There I've said it. It's a goal.

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It's that time of year again...

There is a lot riding on this little black wedge, which just happens to be Sam's first Pinewood Derby car. He and Jake were working on it tonight. The big race is Thursday night. Sam has some big shoes to fill, but I think he's cool with it. Sam's just a cool kid.

Josh decided to make a fun, fashionable car rather than compete for speed with Sam.

Jacob came down to talk a bit tonight. I enjoy talking with him. He's a good kid. When he's not swimming, scouting, or shooting, he spends most of his time in his room studying. He has several hours worth of classes each day with many hours of study time on the side. He's currently reading A Tale of Two Cities. I've never read it, but according to Jacob it's a really great book.

He's taking a few classes this summer. Tonight we were going through his transcript and working out the details. He's on track to graduate April 2012. According to his calculations, that's only 12 months away. That can't possibly be true.

But as much as he has loved Williamsburg, he's been toying with the idea of going out on his own next year. He'd love to make his own decisions on what to study. He's itching to have control of his own education. (Which is the whole point of Scholar Phase.) We've had several conversations about it. He's learned a lot about himself the last two years.

Many don't see that a 15 year old boy would choose to study. And not just study, but study for hours and hours and hours. Or that they could have a desire to spend time with Locke and Montesquieu and de Tocqueville. Once upon a time I would have been surprised myself. But I've watched Jacob grow the last two years into the man he is becoming and it has been a wonderful experience. He wants to learn. He wants to study. It drives him crazy to have classes that last only 50 minutes. Just when the discussion is getting good, he has to move along to the next subject. He'd gladly spend the whole day delving into these subjects.

He's leaning towards graduating next year, getting the diploma, and then focusing his studies in depth.

I'm not sure where he's headed in his life, but I trust him.

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Jake and I spent the day talking, planning, scheming, and dreaming about our cross country bike ride in 2013. You didn't forget about that did you? I told Jake that I wanted to do something Epic with our family. Epic deserves to be capitalized don't you think? (See... this is where I go wrong in my writing. I make up the rules as I go along.)

Epic! We're running out of time because I want to do something Epic! before Jacob leaves on his mission. (Epic! deserves an ! mark after it too don't you think?) I want to have a family adventure of Epic! proportions. We're thinking a year long bicycle tour of the country would be Epic!

Think about it. A year. Just our family. And our bikes. Epic!

To be continued...

Speedy Delivery

2011-03-25T00:06:00.003-08:00

This month marks the third year anniversary of my sharing our story via this blog. I've written 630 posts. The majority of which have been published, though there are a dozen or so drafts lurking out there.

I was going through them and stumbled upon this gem. It was written 11/11/10 at 12:06am. It made me smile. I remember the stress I felt. I remember it vividly. And yet, I was right. I figured it out. {And I can see now that my white balance was totally out of whack when I took this picture of Jake.}

I miss him. Reading this post caused me to miss him more. I yearn to recite his many virtues. Expound on our love. Of his unwavering support of me. But it's too much. It's much simpler than that.

One day I asked him a question. If you could trade places with anyone for a day who would it be?

This is what he said.

You. Because I want you to see yourself the way I see you. I want you to know how much I love you.

11/11/10 12:06am

Its getting to that time of year where the light fades and the plant in me cries out for light. The photographer in me cries out for light too.

A package arrived for me today while I was at the gym (swimming... it's time to start preparing for next year's triathlon). Two packages actually. One contained a strobe off camera flash and the other contained the stand and umbrella.

While the plant in me may not be getting the light it desires by spending the week in California as planned (the photography workshop having been postponed until February), The photographer was able to procure an off camera flash system.

Boy oh boy. I got it set up, turned it on, took a couple pictures and wanted to cry. It's not as easy as it looks, nor as easy as the online tutorials made it sound. I'm taken back to the first few months after getting my camera when I had my children in the basement using them as models to experiment on. It was terrible. I wanted to cry then too. Nothing looked the way I saw it in my mind.

I felt the same way this year when I learned how to shoot in manual. How was I ever going to be able to do it under pressure of a photo shoot? But alas, I learned how to pose a family, and take pictures of children, and use my camera outside of auto. I suppose at some point I'll be able to conquer off camera flash.

I just hope it's sooner than later. Because my light is fading fast and the photographer in me needs light desperately!

*Thanks to Jake for helping out. He's a pretty fantastic model and he does an amazing job calming me down and assuring me that this too shall pass. Happy Veteran's Day Jake!

Mini Me

2011-03-23T11:01:00.008-08:00

I'm feeling better. Thanks for all your kind comments last week.

This is the first week in over six months that I don't have any photo sessions! I had three scheduled, but one little boy got sick, the weather (snow) canceled a family session, and the third session couldn't do it this week.

It feels weird. Freedom.

This is the reason I'm scaling back. I want to have this feeling more often.

But at the same time, I'm itching to take pictures... like I said, weird.

I have a workshop this weekend, and all the hard work is already done. Yay!

The boys and I watched Dancing with the Stars on Hulu last night.

We're going to lunch at Java Flats today.

That's what freedom feels like. Time with my kids. And I love it.

Except when they act like gorillas. Then I want to pull my hair out. And go take pictures.

Sam slept in my bed last night. He kept kicking me.

Now he's organizing the art cupboard.

Josh is in the bathroom; he's avoiding doing the dishes.

Jacob is in an online class.

Jake is gone this week. He's eating out and going to the movies in his off hours. Lucky.

I miss him.

Miss B is off her bottle. It's been a week. We had a ceremony. I handed her the bottles and told her to throw them in the garbage. She was confused and tried to put them away where they belong. But eventually she said bye bye to the bottles and threw them away. Then we watched as Josh took the garbage to the dumpster. We said bye bye bottles the whole time.

The first few days were rough. She cried and signed bottle please over and over again. We had to remind her that we said bye bye to the bottles.

Yesterday she was asking for Daddy. Jacob said he didn't want to tell her that Daddy was bye bye because that's what we said about her bottles and they are never coming back! Good point Jacob.

Last night she woke up at 1am. She has a new cry that drives me bananas. I went to comfort her. I held her, gave her a bink, and whispered I love you in her ear. I pointed at the butterfly over her crib. She said fly. And then she pointed to her crib. I laid her back down and she went to sleep.

She lived on milk for 21 months. Now she won't drink it. She will only drink water out of her sippy cup. But she's eating like there is no tomorrow. Her brothers are shocked at her diapers.

My little Mini Me is begging to be read Brown Bear, Brown Bear, What Do You See?. Time to go.

Hodge Podge

2011-03-16T00:30:00.004-08:00

I imagine this post will be filed under Hodge Podge. My mind is racing. It's 12:32 am and I should be in bed. I've been so good at going to bed at a decent time lately. It feels odd to be up so late, but I can't sleep. Jake is gone. The wind is blowing. And my heart is heavy. But I'm not quite ready to talk about that right now.

My sister Tammy came and spent 10 days with us. She left last Sunday. I'm sorry I never wrote while she was here. We were so busy. She brought my adorable niece Liberty and she and Miss B were terribly sick most of the time they were here. As soon as the girls started to get better, Tammy and I came down with it. I was honestly knocked out for several days. I only barely remember functioning.

I've been mentoring Tammy with her photography. You can check out her stuff at Tammy Smith Photography. She's really talented and it was so fun to have her here. We work well together. Each of our strengths supports the other. I think we could have a pretty rockin' business if we lived near each other!

She took some really great family pictures of us while she was here. We were long overdue. I always avoid being in front of the camera, but I'm so happy we had them done! I've ordered two large prints for my house! One is even a canvas!! Can't wait to show you when they arrive. They should be here this week. I really love this picture she took of Jake and I. Jake just makes me happy and I think this picture reflects it perfectly.

Saturday is the my first Simply b Photos workshop of the year! I have 4 that are sold out and have plans for two more this summer/fall. I truly love teaching! Tammy suggested I offer an "in-house" mentoring session like what we just did with her. A week of intensive training for those who want to start a business. I think it would be great fun!

I've been working on a workbook that will accompany the workshop. So far it is 27 pages of in-detail instructions. I love the information I've written, now I'm ready to look at the format and how it flows. I'm thinking perhaps I could sell it as a stand alone workbook too for those who can't attend the workshops. We'll see where that leads. But I'm working furiously on it because I need to have the first edition ready for Saturday's workshop!

I'm also revamping my power point presentation. I've learned a lot the last six months and I think this next series of workshops are going to be phenomenal! But it's a lot of work. I knew March was going to be a busy month. But today it all seems a little overwhelming. I could use some of Tammy's homeopathic remedy gelsemium. It helps with my feelings of impending doom.

I feel as if I've been neglecting my family for the past two weeks. With Tammy being here and then with me working to prepare for my workshop, I've been totally distracted. I hate that. I feel it even worse in the late night quiet when everyone is asleep and all those thoughts creep into my mind. Have I been a good enough mother today? Did I give everyone what they needed? Are we all okay?

My thoughts tonight are turned to Juanita. This May will be her 13th birthday. How can that be? The memories are so vivid. This life is so fragile. So uncertain. So temporary. We are lulled into believing we have control. That life will always go on as it is now. But it won't. Life will change. Of that we are sure. And sometimes when life throws us a curve ball, all we can do is pray.

I'd feel better if Jake were here. I'd like to roll over and snuggle into his arms. I pray the weather improves and he'll be home tomorrow.

Thanks for listening to me. And checking in with me. {Even though you see the same post for two weeks!} It helps to know you are there.

Happy Birthday Dr. Seuss!

2011-03-02T16:00:00.001-09:00

My friend, Jana, made Sam this shirt! Isn't she sweet?!

Book Worm

2011-02-28T10:19:00.005-09:00

How is your morning going? Mine is fantastic. The sun has been shining in Kodiak for almost a week now. The wind is blowing 70mph too, but I'll take the sunshine however it comes.

My dining room this morning. Josh is writing his story. It's his version of The Three Little Pigs. Sam is sharing with Miss B. She already had breakfast, but she doesn't mind seconds.

Miss B is a book worm. And I don't mean that she likes books. Or even that she loves them. The girl is addicted to them. She seriously cannot get enough. She is aggressive and demanding. She can hold a grown man hostage with her books. She carries them around the house and takes them to bed with her.

This book is her favorite. Although she has several favorites, this one has all the things she loves. Doggies. Airplanes. Butterflies. Birdies. And bunnies.

This is what loved looks like.

She's signing butterfly. She crosses her arms and wiggles her fingers. She signs almost as much as she talks. Airplane. Bottle. More. All done. Ball. Eat. Butterfly. Bird. Quiet. Please. Thank you. Flower. Bunny. Book. We can have quite the conversation.

I love these curls. The top of her hair is straight. I can induce wave if I really try, but it prefers straight.

And I love this smile. Her big, toothy, I love you mommy! smile.

Life. Unexpected.

2011-02-26T08:39:00.003-09:00

You know I love Matilda Jane. Last night I was reading their blog. They are participating in an auction and the proceeds will go to a woman, a photographer, who lost her husband to cancer two weeks ago. Last night I spend some time reading Val Koop's blog. And I cried. I cried for an hour. My nightshirt was wet from my tears.

I cannot even imagine. I do not want to imagine. While I was reading, Jake was sleeping quietly next to me. His hand reached out and found mine. As if he knew I needed reassurance. I only cried harder.

Life is short. Life is unexpected. Yet there is Hope. And Faith. And the knowledge that our Heavenly Father lives. He knows us. And he watches over us. And he sends good friends to help through life's trials. I'm so glad that Val has wonderful friends. Friends who support and love and care. My prayers are with Val and her "chickens" today.

My World... Today.

2011-02-22T20:12:00.009-09:00

8:15am Wake up. Realize we slept in and Miss B is in bed with Jake and I. She's playing with my iPhone while Jake plays Words with Friends on his. He's on Duty tonight and doesn't have to work until 4pm.

8:20am Jake gets into shower. Sister Becky calls. We talk for 15 minutes.

8:35am I get in the shower with Miss B. Jake heads downstairs to make breakfast.

8:45am I lather Miss B in lotion, wrap her in a diaper and send her downstairs to eat breakfast with Daddy. I iron my clothes, brush my hair, lather myself in lotion.

9:05am I walk downstairs to the smell of french toast (made with the most amazing french bread which Jake made yesterday), bacon and orange juice. I opt for a fruit smoothie. Diets. Blah.

9:20am Dry my hair, pack a diaper bag, prepare to run to Walmart before our meeting of Young Knights Club at 11am.

9:30am Give last minute instructions to the children (threaten them with their life) to finish their chores before Dad and I get home.

9:50am Arrive at Walmart. Pick up tempura paint and items to make a cake, frost it, and decorate it as a castle. Oh and some ice cream cones.

10:30am Arrive home. Mix up two cake mixes and get them in the oven. Punch holes in the worksheets I printed last night. Oh Shoot! I forgot to read the book we're discussing today. Quick! Read Magic Tree House Knight Before Dawn. Impress my children with my speed reading abilities. Meanwhile Jake prepares the table with poster board shields, paints, and paint brushes.

10:56am Text attendees and remind them that Young Knights Club is meeting at 11am today. (Oops. I forgot to remind earlier.)

11:08am First Young Knight arrives.

11:15am All Young Knights have arrived. (The other two.) Discuss the book. Talk about coat of arms. Show the boys a coat of arms with their family name (printed out especially for them). Discuss how to design their own coat of arms. Turn the time over to them to create.

11:45am Cut and frost the cooled cake pieces into a makeshift castle.

12:00pm Ooh and Ahh over each coat of arms created. Turn the frosted cake and plenty of candy over to the boys to decorate.

12:15pm Take pictures.

12:30pm Discuss knights and knighthood and chivalrous behavior and manners. (Bore the knights to tears.)

1:00pm Gather the knights to deliver them to their homes. Drive to town with Jake and Sam.

1:20pm Arrive at bank. Get cashiers check to return tenant's deposit.

1:30pm Buy chinese food at Safeway's Deli.

1:32pm Throw away chinese food from Safeway's Deli. Vow never to buy chinese food again.

2:00pm Arrive home. Sit on couch for first time. Look up flights to Italy on the laptop. Research guided tours in Italy. Discuss with Jake whether we should go to Hawaii or Italy next February. Dream for a moment about time alone with Jake.

3:00pm Remind Sam and Jacob about swimming. Change over laundry. Look at the baskets overflowing with clean laundry ready to be folded and realize it is not going to get folded today. Get Miss B ready to go.

3:20pm Drop Jake off at work. Pick up Josh from friends house. Drive to the pool for swim team.

3:50pm Arrive at pool. Meet Nancy (my co- cub scout den leader) for a meeting on the bleachers about scouts. Talk about Cub Scouts. Plan a 3 month schedule. Watch Sam swim back and forth. Keep an eye on Miss B as she wanders the bleachers with Nancy's keys.

5:15pm Drive home. Talk with Aiden (neighbor boy riding home with us) about how he likes school. (He likes it. Mostly.)

5:30pm Arrive home. Check the mail. Excitedly show Josh and Sam the sweet scarves for Miss B that arrived from Zulily. (They were not as impressed as I.) Put corn dogs in the oven for dinner. Yummo. Or not. Download pictures from computer. Call clients about scheduling photography sessions. Return emails.

6:10pm Eat corn dog.

6:15pm Regret eating corn dog.

6:20pm Leave to pick Jacob up for swimming. Drive to town while receiving my private air show. Regret (over and over) not having my camera as I watch Jake fly over the water, with the mountains pink from the setting sun. His plane stark against the clear sky. Slow to watch him fly.

6:40pm Pick Jacob up. Head home for the 4th time today. Talk with Dani on the phone while I continue to watch Jake soar.

6:57pm Drive through base gate. Rather than head home, drive to an overlook so we can watch Jake do "touch and go's". The light quickly fading as the sun set behind the mountains an hour prior. The plane lights are fireflies in the sky. He comes in for a landing only to take off again immediately. I realize (again) that I'm an idiot for not having my camera with me.

7:10pm Arrive home. Skype my sister Tammy for a quick mentoring session on Photoshop.

7:40pm Jake texts. He's landed. Time to go pick him up.

8:12pm Sit down at computer to blog.

Later tonight...? Editing. Three sessions in the queue. It's going to be a late night.

Tugging at my heart strings.

2011-02-20T20:53:00.002-09:00

Ethiopian Orphans from Simon Scionka on Vimeo.

Brothers

2011-02-15T08:13:00.003-09:00

I'm grateful my sons have each other. The bond between brothers is truly a remarkable gift.

*Josh and Jacob at a swim meet last month

*At swim meets coaches write on the swimmer's arm. In Sharpie they outline each event, heat, and stroke they will be swimming. Here Josh is explaining to Sam how to read his arm.

Sam was crazy scared at his first swim meet. He almost backed out several times. But his brothers encouraged him, stayed with him (rather than being with their own team), offered support, and cheered him on.

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A couple weeks ago the boys had another swim meet. Josh was feeling under the weather and so Miss B and I stayed home with him while Jake took Jacob and Sam. Later that afternoon I received this message from a good friend.

Missed you this morning. But we are hoping that Josh gets feeling better soon!

I have to tell you that I sure admire and respect Jacob! He brought tears to my eyes today as I watched him go over and give Sam a high five before Sam's heat and then he walked alongside the pool cheering him along the whole way. Just the love and caring that he showed Sam today just made my "mommy heart" melt! He is an amazing young man!

Thank you!!!!!
Nancy

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Last weekend the kids and I were at the Exchange (the convenience store on base) looking for a movie to rent. A woman approached us and I heard her exclaim It's the Homeschool Boys! I smiled in a questioning way as I did not recognize her. She responded, I work at the movie theater on base and I love when your boys come in. I don't know their names; I just call them the Homeschool Boys. They are so nice and polite and good to each other. I just love to see them!

We proceeded to chat for a bit. I introduced myself and the boys and I met her twin daughters. I'm so glad she took the time to talk to us!

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Yesterday I got a call from Jacob. He and Josh were at the pool for swim team. {They swim at two different times, back to back. When Josh gets out of the pool, Jacob gets in.} Someone had stolen all of Josh's clothes out of his locker. Josh and his friend had searched every locker looking for his belongings, to no avail. His friend had to leave and Josh turned to his brother. He went out on deck and to his utter mortification, he started to cry while telling Jacob what had happened.

A few kids on Jacob's team snickered at Josh's tears. Jacob got out of the water to help his brother. They searched through each locker (again), the garbages, the showers, and the bathroom stalls. Jacob inquired at the Lost and Found. And then they called me. Jake and I gathered fresh clothes for Josh and went to pick them up. Rather than go back to swimming, Jacob got dressed and stayed with Josh until we arrived.

My heart cried for Josh. He had felt so alone and vulnerable in his swimsuit looking for his clothes. And then to be mocked by others was salt in the wound. But he had his brother. His big brother who would stand by his side to comfort and support.

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My boys aren't perfect. And they argue more than they get along. And sometimes they drive me nuts. But they know when to stick together. At the end of the day they have each other's backs.

One. More. Year.

2011-02-10T22:30:00.003-09:00

We got the news today.

We're staying in Kodiak another year. And that's all I'm going to say about that.

Now I can start planning. Jake and I are going to go to Hawaii to celebrate our 17th wedding anniversary. Our anniversary is in October, but I think we'd rather go to Hawaii in February. October is still beautiful here. February is not. I started Weight Watchers last week. (Today was my first weigh in. I lost 4 pounds!) By next February perhaps I'll be beach ready. That's my goal.

We're also going to visit family this summer. I think we'll fly to Sacramento and then drive to Utah. I'm looking forward to seeing my parents and sisters and their families! They haven't even met Miss B yet and I'll finally meet Miles and Adelaide (my nephew and niece). Jacob is going to attend EFY (Especially for Youth) at BYU (Brigham Young University) in June and then he and Josh are going to go to BYU's swim camp.

The boys are fantastic swimmers. Jacob made 4 Junior Olympic times this year. Although he won't be attending. It's the same week as Elevation. (The outdoor leadership camp he attends each spring and fall in Southern Utah.) His coach will be happy to hear he'll be here to swim with the high school team this fall. His times are only a couple seconds off Regional times. I bet he attends Regionals next year in Seattle.

Tomorrow I'm going to spend the day planning. And buying tickets. Prices to and from Alaska will be rising any day now. I've got to strike while they are only $800 roundtrip instead of $1200! Living in Alaska is not cheap.

New Spaces

2011-02-05T21:00:00.007-09:00

For 20 months Miss B's crib lived in our room just feet from the end of our bed. Her first year the crib served as decoration. She preferred sleeping in our bed. All our children did. And we don't mind. They're only small for a moment.

The next six months her crib saw her safely through her naps. {She rarely fusses at being laid down for a nap.} At night we started to put her to bed in the crib, but within a few hours she was nestled in between her daddy and I.

And by nestled I mean with her head on her daddy's back and her feet kicking my side. Cozy.

The last couple months she started sleeping through the night. After a year and a half it's the oddest thing to get a full nights sleep.

Last week we moved her crib into her own room and now my room feels empty. She's growing too quickly. It's time to have another baby. It's on my mind a lot lately.

Miss B is afraid of the dark. And not just a little. She really doesn't like the dark. Driving home from town after dark is miserable for the whole family. There are no street lights on the 6 mile stretch from town to base. With the exception of the occasional headlight of a passing car, its a dark drive home. And Miss B cries. We tried giving her a flashlight to play with, but she kept blinding the driver. Any suggestions?

At night we keep the bathroom light on so that if she wakes up, she's not in the dark. When she moved into her own room I asked Jake to pick up a nightlight at Walmart for her. He came home with the mother of all nightlights. It projects a castle and dancing fairy onto the ceiling above her crib. I like imagining Jake in the nightlight aisle at Walmart picking out a light for his little girl.

*Picture courtesy of Sam-a-lam.

**Our very talented friend made this for Miss B. Love it!

Miss B and her daddy.

2011-02-03T22:16:00.003-09:00

I posted about Miss B and her daddy over on Simply b's website.

Oh and I talked about laundry.

I'm not sure I can post without talking about laundry. (Click here if you want to see it.)

The Real Deal

2011-02-02T22:39:00.001-09:00

I wrote a post two years ago titled CDO. (Click Here) I am no longer CDO.

I thought my boys kept me from falling of the edge. And I believe they did. Enough to keep me this side of sane. But having boys, and a business, and a toddler have shoved me so far back from the edge that I'm teetering on the other side of looney.

One day I hope to shuffle back to middle ground or perhaps even a little further to the other side. The side that creates order from chaos rather than try in desperation to loosely control it. Or worse yet, succumbs to it's power.

I'm not getting my hopes up yet. At this moment there are 76 loads of laundry hiding behind my couch that need to be folded.

Anyway...

When I was CDO I wanted a laminator. And I've been CDO for as long back as I can remember. If I'd had a laminator, I would have laminated everything. My entire world would have been plastic coated. But they were crazy expensive, so we never bought one. And the last 20 months in the decline of my CDO, the furthest thing from my mind was a laminator.

But then our friends gave us all their super yummy recipes in a Word Document customized to be printed to 3x5 cards.

They showed us how they had printed them on card stock, and then layered them onto another (more colorful) card stock, laminated them, hole punched them and put them on a ring to hang in their kitchen.

STOP THE PRESSES!

Were they serious?! I felt a bit of my CDO peek through and beg me to follow their lead.

I purchased card stock (in white and color) and sent Jake to the store to get the 4x6 laminating pouches. Our friends had offered to laminate the cards for us.

Jake called from The Walmart and asked if I just wanted him to purchase a laminator. I hesitated. I was excited about the project but didn't want to break the bank. He informed me that a laminator cost $30. WHAT?! $30!! Are you kidding me?!

I told him to buy that bad boy and bring him straight home to his mother. (That may or may not have been a direct quote.)

And then we set to laminating. In all honesty, Jake did most of the work while I was editing pictures. (I miss out on some of the funnest activities!)

Just looking at these pictures makes me happy. All those wonderful recipes all plastic coasted. *Sigh* It's heaven. I can't stop admiring them.

Tuesday was the first meeting of the Kodiak Branch Young Knights Club. (There was a North Pole Branch in 2008.) We have four knights on the roster. They'll meet a couple times a month to discuss books they've read (from the Magic Tree House series) and do activities surrounding the theme of that weeks book.

The first order of business was to photograph each knight and issue an ID. The back has their code of conduct.

And then we got down to business. Making fake ID cards. I'm a sucker for fake ID's. I've been making them since Jacob was 4 years old. His first card was on blue construction paper with a tiny picture of him cut out and a hand drawn picture of the Great Seal of the United States. We covered it in packing tape to finish the official look. He used to flash the gate guard in Del Rio, Texas at Laughlin AFB. If they were cool, they would salute him as we drove through. Jacob perfected his salute during our time there.

But now I've got serious equipment! Camera, Photoshop, Laminator. Check, Check, and Check. No matter that these babies are 4 inches by 6 inches. To these kids, they are the real deal. They even have a bar code! (I'm the coolest mother in the cul-de-sac tonight.)

The boys chose their rank. Josh went with Major.

Sam went with General. And now Josh is annoyed that Sam outranks him. I see a new ID in Josh's future. Air Force Chief of Staff perhaps?

In answer to your question. No. That isn't Sam's social security number. If it is yours, I apologize.

Our doorbell rang tonight at 7pm. Two of the neighbor children requesting ID's for themselves. We now live next door to an admiral of the Navy and colonel in the Marines. Nice to have connections.

I did explain the seriousness of having fake ID's. If they are ever detained or arrested when trying to use their ID's they should never divulge where they received them from. I think making fake ID's is a federal offense.

You Make Me Happy.

2011-01-31T19:59:00.003-09:00

This is my new favorite song.

I have an entire playlist based around this song. Filled with songs that have a similar feel. I listen to it during photoshoots. Or when I'm cleaning the house, or making breakfast, or playing with my kids. The music fills me with happiness. Especially when my house is clean and my to-do list is manageable. But not necessarily.

My blog has been a bit superficial lately. And by lately I mean the last 9 months. Pictures and blurbs that relate to our comings and goings. Not too much depth. The other day I went back through my archives. I enjoyed the reminiscing. Many of the posts made me smile. But I had a twinge of sadness too. Because the last nine months (or so) I don't have a consistent record to reflect on. And what I have written doesn't quite seem to represent the whole story.

Writing is cathartic to me. It helps to clear my head and gather my thoughts. I've written in a journal my whole life. I have a record of my first kiss on September 19, 1991. I was days away from turning 18. My whole life ahead of me. And this amazing young man was all I could think about. And I wrote about it... him... Jake. I have a series of letters that I wrote to Jacob after he was born. The wonder of having our first child is evident in my words. There is an entry that I wrote in GIANT LETTERS exclaiming the joy I felt when Jake graduated from pilot training. I've filled books and books with my writings.

Almost three years ago I started a blog. A web log. At first I tried to do both. Write in my journal and on my blog. It didn't take long before I had phased out the journal. Which is sad in it's own right. There are things I don't write about on here. Deep dark emotions and feelings don't find the light of day. I find I am more optimistic and look for the good around me to write and share with you. I write more about the mundane. But the beauty of the mundane makes me smile. I don't discuss our finances. Which in my journals was an ongoing thread. (I'm an accountant at heart.) I don't write my negative thoughts or my frustrations. (Typically.) Of course there was that series I wrote at Disney World a couple years ago.

I like the story that my blog tells, but it's not the whole story. It's like only seeing the "After" picture and not seeing the "Before". You would need both to tell the whole story. But I guess I don't need to share it all. I’m okay with keeping the negativity and the whining to a minimum. It’s not my style anyhow.

I stumbled upon a popular mommy blog the other day and I was fascinated. The posts were all written tongue in cheek. Sarcasm dripped from each sentence. I could tell she was joking, but there was enough that it bothered me somewhat. Were her children really that terrible? Was motherhood such a chore?

Anyway, what I’m getting at is I want to write more. Quips and blurbs and sneak peaks are good as an occasional snack, but not the whole meal. I want to look back on this time and have a picture of our life. The life I love. This busy, crazy, trying my hardest life.

That being said, I’ve got a post to write…

Our family enjoys adventures.

ad·ven·ture

an exciting or very unusual experience.

We've had many, of all different sorts. Travel, moving, road trips, TDYs with Jake. We're always up for something different. But the thread in common through all our adventures is the time we spend as a family. We'd rather be together than with anyone else. It's an opportunity to forget the rest of the world and focus on us. Reconnecting.

I had a conversation with a gal at the swimming pool the other day. She was asking how in the world people from Kodiak could afford to travel. It’s so expensive! she exclaimed. I understand. It is. But we value travel and adventures more than we treasure toys. We don’t have a travel trailer, camper, four wheeler, skis, snow mobile, jet ski (ha!), surf board (double ha!), boat, go-cart or anything other than Jake’s truck. Not even a second car.

It’s about priorities. For some people paying rent is a priority. If you have that covered you may prefer putting food on the table and paying the electricity bill. It may be tools for a business. Or money for a rainy day. Everyone makes a decision on where their money goes. And for most of us, it can’t be everywhere at once. And when all our basics are met, Jake and I prefer to lavish ourselves with adventures.

I think I get some of that from my childhood. I have amazing wonderful memories with my family on our adventures. We always looked forward to the next one. Even if it was a Sunday drive to Flagstaff to look at the snow. But even better if it was a trip to Disneyland.

Two and a half years ago Jake and I had the difficult decision of joining the Coast Guard or staying with the Alaska Air National Guard. In the end it came down to adventures. We were ready for something new. We wanted to see fresh sights and meet new people. We loved the friends we had, but we wanted the family time that inevitably came with an adventure. The refocusing on what is really important to us.

Do you notice that as your life progresses you start to accumulate items, activities, things that take up space in your life that aren’t the most important things? Yet somehow they consume the most energy? I’m a magnet to those. I burrow in and nest and fill my life with numerous commitments and responsibilities that initially invigorate and awaken but eventually bog down and overwhelm.

(Whew! That last sentence was a mouthful, yet sums up my whole post. I told you writing helps me to clear my head and gather my thoughts. It took 1009 words to get to the root of what I was getting at. No wonder I fill pages and pages with my musings.)

What I’m getting at is we've been having a lot of conversations around here. This is our year to transfer. We arrived in 2008 and our tour in Kodiak was prescribed for 3 years. That means we should be moving this summer. We had the option of staying a year. No questions asked. And initially I thought we would go that route.
But as our time here has neared to an end, I’ve become anxious to see what is on the horizon. Our talk is centered on time with cousins, aunts, uncles, and grandparents. Both our parents have had some health scares lately. My parents have moved from Alaska. We feel the pull to be closer to our family in the Lower 48.

We have made a home in Kodiak. It’s comfortable. And it’s filled with wonderful friends and activities and responsibilities. Regardless of when, it will be tough to leave. Saying goodbye stinks.

Our options for new locations are limited. The Coast Guard only flies C-130’s out of 5 bases. Kodiak, Alaska. Barber’s Point, Hawaii. Sacramento, California. Clearwater, Florida. Elizabeth City, North Carolina. Those are our choices. We’d prefer to go to Sacramento. It’s close to our all family. It’s familiar. Of all our choices, Sacramento is HIGH on the list, leagues ahead of any other. I don’t even know how to rank the other options.

In any case, it may not matter. The Detailer alerted Jake’s chain of command that they were assigning Jake to stay in Kodiak another year. It’s not set in stone. We’re awaiting orders.

I look to the scripture posted on my wall over my computer. “Trust in the Lord with all thine heart and lean not unto thine own understanding.” Proverbs 3:5. I trust my Heavenly Father. Unquestionably. He has directed our paths. Time and again. And I’m thankful for the stories that have been left unwritten. (I can’t wait to write about that. Remind me will you?)

We love adventures and the time we spend together when we have them. But if we’re supposed to stay here another year, I understand. I’ll be disappointed. (And please don’t think less of me if I throw a tiny fit behind closed doors.) But we’ll figure it out.

I’ll write a post about a ”Six Month No”. And then I’ll take the kiddos to spend the summer with family down in the states. We’ll thaw and we’ll enjoy the sunshine. And then we’ll figure it out.

Have you listened to that song up there yet? I hope you do. This morning Jake and I were discussing his conversation with the Detailer. And that song popped in my head.

Sometimes the things we think will make us happy are just things. Adventures? Toys? Treasures? In the end, they are simply extras. They will come and they will go.

My family makes me happy. Jake makes me happy. It’s enough.

Binky Baby

2011-01-28T10:07:00.004-09:00

This girl and her binkies. She trades them out as if they have different flavors.

P.S. I'm amazed that you all knew about Bag Balm! Even my father. Though we never had it in our house... did we? (None of my sisters chimed in on that post. So I can't tell for sure.)

Bag Balm

2011-01-26T17:45:00.003-09:00

Have you heard of Bag Balm? I had not. Until my neighbor introduced me to it. Sam-a-lam gets the worst chapped lips. Ever. He licks and licks and they get more and more inflamed. We've tried everything. Chapstick. Healing Salve. Vaseline. Earth Mama Angel Baby Bottom Balm. You name it. Nothing worked.

Enter Erica (my awesome neighbor). She brought over this little green tin box filled with salve. It's for cows' udders. Really. I was skeptical. It seemed a little like using Mane and Tail on your hair (which I have). When I googled, the first clip noted that Bag Balm had "not been approved by the FDA for human use." Nice. But to be polite we tried it out. (How's that for motherly love? Sure Sam, it's not approved for human use, but let's be polite and try it anyway.)

But I'll be darned if the next morning his chappedness was almost healed. We decided to steal her Bag Balm. Unfortunately several days later she sent one of her kiddos over to retrieve it. Bummer. But she let us borrow it when the chapping got really bad.

We needed to acquire our own little green tin, but couldn't find any on the island. Jake thought we'd need a feed store. Yesterday we went to Anchorage for the day on the med flight. I was armed with a list... of course. Bag Balm was on said list. Target was our third stop. (After International House of Pancakes and Great Clips.) We needed a pinata for the upcoming Blue and Gold Banquet for Cub Scouts. And really, who needs an excuse to go to Target? Especially when you live on an island? While we perused the health and beauty aids, I asked an employee if they carried Bag Balm. It's in a green tin. It's like a salve. I said. He didn't have a clue what I was talking about.

Several aisles later another employee (who was several yards away) inquired as to our needs. Jake was closer. Ask him about Bag Balm. I said. Jake turned back towards me and replied. They aren't going to have that here.

Were you looking for Bag Balm? The employee supposed.

Yes! I responded.

You can find it behind the pharmacy counter! He exclaimed.

Thanks! I called out.

And I laughed at Jake. Because it was funny.

And now we have a ginormous tin of Bag Balm. As well as a little tiny tin of Bag Balm. And Sam's lips thank us.

.
.
.

When I think of Sam, this is how I see him. He's a sweetheart. And he's perfect.

But when my camera sees Sam. It records this. Chapped lips and all. I'm glad I have it recorded. Because that is part of his story. It's good to have the before picture.

But I like the after too. Because that's how I'll always remember Sam-a-lam.

Our trip to Anchorage was impromptu. Monday morning Jake was assigned to take the Tuesday flight. Monday night we decided to go with him. Because we could. And it sounded fun. And we really needed to go to the Scout Store to get advancements for the Cub Scouts. A minivan rental was $87. But we got to eat at Red Robin. (As well as the International House of Pancakes.) Some things are just worth it. (But not the trip to the Scout Store. That's never fun.)

I got to see my Triathlon Training Partner Dani. Do you remember Dani? She was diagnosed with colon cancer last year? Stage 4 colon cancer? And it had spread to her lungs? Remember her? She moved to Palmer. And now she's in remission. And I'm totally not even kidding. Miracles seriously do happen. She had breakfast with us at International House of Pancakes. It was so good to see her. I miss her. She looks good.

While we were in town we dropped Joshua and Jacob off at the 5th Avenue Mall with cousins Andrew and Sabrina. It was a last minute plan dreamt up between Jacob and Andrew in the wee hours before our plane departed Kodiak for Anchorage. Those two are attached at the cell phone. Not long after dropping them off at the mall (while we were at the Toyota Dealer looking at minivans) I got a call from them. They were bored. They would have preferred to be at a book store.

But to make the most of their time, they visited Build-A-Bear. They made a surprise for Miss B. They kissed the little heart that goes inside and made a wish for her. And then dressed it in the cutest cardigan sweater ever. Jacob said it was the only thing there he could imagine Miss B wearing. She loves it. And I'm reminded how much her brothers love her.

All in all we're doing good. This is my week "on" for Simply b. One shoot down today, four more this week. I added one to my schedule next week too. Because I'm finished working on May 21st after my workshop in North Pole. And I'm trying to fit in as many people before I finish working. Because we're either moving, or I'm taking the summer off. Either way, I'll be done with Simply b for a while.

How are you? It's been quiet in the comments section lately. I like to hear from you.

3/52

2011-01-22T08:31:00.002-09:00

This morning (Saturday) we're up early. Each Saturday morning should start as nicely as today. Jake and I went to bed early last night and Miss B slept the entire night in her crib (for the second night in a row). We slept thoroughly and soundly and it was wonderful. The boys jumped out of bed excited for their day and did their chores while Jake made a yummy breakfast for everyone. *Bliss*

Now Jake is on duty and the ~~boys~~ children (Isn't that interesting? I'm in the habit of writing boys. It's different to write kiddos or children.) and I are headed to town for a swim meet. It's Sam-a-lam's first. He's nervous. But not as nervous as Josh. Josh doesn't like meets because he has to dive from the platform. He sometimes does belly flops and he gets embarrassed. Jacob swam last night too. He made a JO (Junior Olympics) time for his 200 Backstroke. He's swimming a couple more events today.

I'll be busy on the sidelines with Miss B. She's a handful at the pool. She likes to sneak past the fence and run toward the pool with wild abandon. It takes years off my life while I run screaming across the deck. And that's just during the practices. I'm trying not to imagine what 4 hours at the pool will look like.

That picture up there is my picture of the week. 3/52. It makes me smile. The theme was "Shades of Grey".

Better get to the pool now.

Happy Saturday!

2/52

2011-01-15T10:25:00.001-09:00

It's Saturday morning. Jake is sitting duty. The 24 hour kind. Blah.

The boys are out shoveling the neighborhood. They are seeking cash. Their stores have run dry since lawn mowing season ending months ago.

I've got the crockpot soaking in the sink. It got left on warm all night and now tortilla soup is etched on its finish.

While making Miss B a bottle this morning (yes she's still on the bottle), I noticed my husband cleaned out the microwave! That made my day. It's the little things that have the biggest impact, isn't it?

I digress. This post is about

PROJECT 52

Here's my favorite picture this week.

I was in the kitchen doing dishes yesterday shortly after I wrote this post. I looked up to view the clouds rolling across the sky leaving blue in their wake. I was compelled to take a picture. We really do live in an absolutely stunning place.

When (or if?) we move, I will miss the beauty. I'll miss the quiet. I'll miss the clear skies at night with stars shining brilliantly. I'll miss my backyard. I'll miss the breathtaking view on the drive to town. I'll miss the eagles. I'll miss the community.

I'm not sure I'm able to post without a picture of Miss B.

Good Night's Sleep

2011-01-14T09:03:00.002-09:00

I've been up since 5:39 this morning. And I feel rested. The last two nights I've been in bed (and asleep) before 10pm. I'd like to make a habit of it. I often find myself up late editing. But the day after, I get up late and I'm groggy. That's no good for Mommy. This morning I've been insanely productive. I've finished most of my editing and other miscellaneous tasks (including tinkering with my new Valentine's Day templates and balancing my credit card statements).

It's 9:03am and still dark outside. The streetlight shines in my window illuminating the blowing snow. I can hear Jacob's desk chair creaking upstairs in his room. School is in session. Miss B and Josh are snuggling in my bed. Sam is sacked out on the bottom bunk in his room. Jake is flying to one of the Aleutian Islands today. With the weather we've been having, I'll be surprised if they are able to fly home tonight.

I'm about to wake the kiddos. I'm thinking about making pancakes. Pancakes make our days happier. Then I'm going to put the makings for tortilla soup in the crock pot. I'm not going to be working (Simply b kind of work) today. I'm going to read Miss B her favorite books. All of them. It may take a while. She's a book fiend. And I'm going to fold laundry. Lots and lots of laundry (of course). Then I'm going to make cookies. Because we have a gazillion inches of snow outside. And warm cookies and hot chocolate seem like just the way to welcome the kids in from the inevitable sledding they will be doing.

I can already sense a good day ahead. And I owe it all to a good night's sleep.

Raiment

2011-01-11T22:18:00.005-09:00

Clothing. It's a weakness. And a passion.

I've always adored dressing my children. The boys always have more clothes than they can wear. It's nothing new. My addiction started the first time I laid eyes on Baby Gap when Jacob was a tyke. They had me at the $4.99 sales.

But having Miss B has taken my hobby (for lack of a better word) to a whole new level. It's dangerous having an adorable daughter.

I love every minute of it.

See her cute hair clip? Her daddy made it. He actually felted the wool and created the little flower with the cute dots. Then my friend (and neighbor) put it on a clip. It's one of my favorite accessories.

Her daddy is a fascinating man. One who felts wool to make his daughter flowers. I like that about him.

Little Rocks

2011-01-11T00:52:00.004-09:00

*This photo has nothing to do with my post. But I love it nonetheless.

I should totally be in bed. It's 12:52am. I'm exhausted. I've been up late editing. I'm almost done with the shoot and I have one more to go and then I'll be caught up. Feels good. I'm doing a shoot on Wednesday with Miss B and a friend. It's for Matilda Jane. I'm trying to decide if I'm going to incorporate cupcakes. I want to, but on the other hand, I see a big giant mess. Decisions. Decisions.

I've got a "Best of 2010" contest going on over on Facebook. It's so much fun! I love seeing all the activity. It's the simple things that make my day.

Jake and I are talking more and more about moving. The detailer will be calling Jake "before February" (specific eh?) to clarify and discuss our options with him. The detailer is the person in the Coast Guard who holds our lives in his/her hands. They make the decision on what our fate will be this summer. We're due to transfer out of Kodiak. We're waiting for further instruction from the detailer. We're hopeful to receive the final decision by the end of February. This being our first PCS season with the Coast Guard, we're still foggy on the details.

If I had my druthers, we'd go to Sacramento. West Coast. Family. Disneyland. (Not necessarily in that order.) We're waiting to see. We may end up in Florida. Heck. We may end up in Kodiak. It's like the game of Life. We're waiting to see what the dice tells us to do.

But today I crunched all the numbers. Here/there. Go/Stay. It was enlightening. If we move, it won't be about the money. And although it's always about the money, it's never about the money.

It's about family. "No success can compensate for failure in the home." I believe that. Our family comes first.

It always has. Remember this post? Seems I have a knack for filling my jar with the little rocks. Change helps me shake them all out and re-prioritize.

And I'll never complain about the opportunity to slow down and focus on my family.

Never Ending Story

2011-01-07T23:15:00.004-09:00

If you've spent any time with me on the blog, you know I always have laundry to fold. Always. There is no exception to that rule. Ever.

In days past (passed?) my laundry always rested on our loveseat. It was the most convenient place. That was until we got a new couch. The spot in our living room where our Christmas tree lived is now the perfect place to pile laundry. It hides easily and out of sight. The children, when they change the laundry over, bring the basket of clean clothes and add it to the pile just as the dumptrucks add snow to our back yard. It creates the same effect.

The only problem with the laundry piling out of sight is that it is too easy to ignore. And so the pile gets higher and higher until we have to dig for towels and underwear. Then we are in crisis.

Today I relocated the pile from behind the couch to on top of the couch. Immediately laundry became my priority. But first I took a picture and posted it on Facebook.

The responses I received were amusing. It was a popular picture; many people chimed in. There were the reassuring comments; those who have been there. And there were those who were shocked. And I even received some words of advice. I like Facebook for that reason. Instant feedback. It's different from a blog. Hello? Is this thing on?

But Facebook only gets my one liners. My status updates. They limit my characters. They don't get behind the scenes. I feel like my blog readers {aka you} and I are in an exclusive club. You get the whole story. They don't know that I actually love to fold laundry. It's my favorite chore. I love to watch an episode of Castle while I trifold my towels. I love to caress the bright whites. I love the smell of fresh laundry. Clean Cotton is my favorite Yankee Candle scent.

So my big heap o' laundry doesn't come from a disdain for folding. Simply a lack of time to sit and fold the amount of laundry that is generated daily. Occasionally my neighbor will come over to chat with me while I fold. That helps the time fly. My sisters used to do that for me once upon a time.

I thought of documenting my clean laundry pile every day for 365 days. It would make an interesting stop animation film.

Instead I'm doing a Project 52. One favorite picture a week. This week's picture is that one up there at the top. The one of the laundry. Because that sums up my life right now. It has Miss B in it for perspective. Without her you can't really see the enormity of the pile.

After I took the picture I decided it was too beautiful a day to fold clothes and waste the natural light. I put Miss B down for a nap and begged her brothers to let me take pictures of them.

You see, I really really love being a photographer. If I could do anything, I would take pictures.

Sam is the best model. He will simply sit and let me snap away. I'll make goofy noises or tell him jokes to try and coax a smile, but typically he's a poker face.

We started indoors. But the lighting wasn't quite what I wanted. Plus outdoors was just too insistent. We had to soak up some rays.

But I love the shadow of the cleft in Sam's chin in this picture! It's subtle, but I adore it!

The light was better on the porch.

But I loved it even more in the backyard. I love the sun. It is good for my soul.

And after Sam froze his katookis off patiently allowing me to photograph him, I turned on Josh.

As easy as Sam is to shoot, Josh is difficult.

He doesn't love to model. In fact I think it's his least favorite thing on earth.

But he's one of my favorite subjects. He has the most amazing eyes. They are like ice.

And his pictures always have so much depth in them.

They may not always be willing, but I'm lucky to have such amazing children to practice on.

And after all that, I still managed to fold the entire pile of laundry. Meanwhile two more loads piled up and are now waiting for me.

1.06.11

2011-01-06T15:22:00.002-09:00

During the month we had the tree keeping us company in the front room, Miss B was not overly interested in the ornaments. She rearranged a few. And she broke a few. Including, sadly, one of our favorites - the glass icicle we bought at Santa Claus' house in North Pole. But for the most part she was respectful.

It's been eleven days since we took down the Christmas tree. Everything has been tucked safely until next year. But we continue to find ornaments hid away here and there courtesy of Miss B. An apple slid behind our book shelf, a snowflake behind the couch, a bell under my bed...

That little Miss B is tricky.

...

Remember that black hole that was hiding all my stuff?

Well, it returned my favorite flip flops. The ugly ones that are crazy comfortable.

Miss B was sporting them yesterday. Her little piggies just barely big enough to drag them across the floor.

Eight Days

2011-01-04T20:46:00.005-09:00

Eight. Days. It's been my mantra today. I've repeated it a dozen times. Or more.

On behalf of my family, I've worked out a new schedule for Simply b. The past six months have been tough and I'm vowing to slow things down. {I know, you've heard it before... but this time I have a system. A schedule. A plan.}

I'm going to be working one week on, one week off.

And my week off starts tomorrow! Wheee!

I've still got loads of editing to do from my past week, but no shoots. Just me and my family.

The holidays are over.

We appear to be healthy.

HOLD EVERYTHING!

There is no way I can continue on the same train of thought. That will have to wait for another entry.

Because...

Jake just got Miss B out of the bath (worst poo ever).

He was massaging her with lotion.

And.

Wait for it.

.
.
.

She just said Daddy!

It sounds like Dadeee!

And I cried.

Now she's saying Momeee!

Oh. Goodness.

Nothing like those first words to just melt your heart.

I had this picture saved for another post, but it seems appropriate to add it here.

Here's stingy Miss B doling out one of her sweet kisses.

The day that wasn't

2011-01-03T21:14:00.001-09:00

Jacob is 15.

(And he needs a haircut. His hair is crazy curly. Corkscrews. It can get pretty fuzzy. His dad told him he was going to by him a pick.)

I was teasing him about a girl today. He thought I was being a dork. *Sigh*

He can't wait to leave Kodiak. He'd like to be around girls. Girls that attend the same church as he does. He wants to go to Saturday night dances. And Youth Conference. And all those cool things that the outside world gets to do.

I'm cringing right now that next year he'll be driving and dating. And in four years he'll be leaving on a mission. No, I'm not even thinking about that right now.

This is our backyard.

The dumptrucks bring all the snow from the base and dump it behind our house. That's a lot of snow!

The boys are in heaven.

This is my new facebook profile picture. I can't resist her funny grin.

Miss B loves to take baths. Josh is her most common bather. He's also her favorite brother. There is just something special about their relationship.

Today should have been the day to get back into our schedule.

Monday: P90X, seminary, writing class, photoshoot, swim team, family home evening

But it wasn't.

Jake's alarm didn't go off. The first time in my knowledge that an alarm has failed him.

Immediately P90X and seminary were off the table.

Stomach flu having visited our family recently canceled writing class.

Photoshoot (check)

Swim team. What?! Swim team? Oops. Forgot about that.

Family Home Evening (kinda sorta check)

We're going to try again tomorrow. At 4:30am. Which is why I have to go to bed. This instant.

The Valley of the Shadow of Death

2011-01-02T14:07:00.006-09:00

Jake and I welcomed 2011 with the worst stomach flu I could have imagined... at the same time. It was bad. Really, really bad. We spent the first day of the year together in bed. Moaning. And it wasn't fun at all. But while my energy level could be equated to that of a limp noodle, we are on the mend. Apparently it was of the 24 hour variety. Which is good. Because one more hour and I would have passed to the other side. I swear I glimpsed the valley a time or two.

So I have nothing to say about New Year's Day. No resolutions, no lists, nothing. Maybe tomorrow. Probably not though.

So here's some pics from New Year's Eve. Miss B had the stomach flu the day before (poor, poor baby). We decided against a big party and decided to go low key.

We drove to the beach and launched fireworks. Miss B and I stayed in the car. She thought it was fun until they started to explode. Then she wouldn't leave my lap, her little face buried in my shoulder.

Later, we played games. Mexican Railroad and Catan. I highly recommend them both for a great family evening. {In fact, as I write this, the boys are setting up Catan to play again.} We stayed up and counted down to midnight. It was a thoroughly enjoyable evening, though totally eclipsed by the nightmare that was yesterday.

How was your New Years? I'd love to hear what you did to celebrate!

Let it snow...

2010-12-28T20:01:00.002-09:00

Winter held it's breath for months. But the last few days it exhaled and covered us with snow.

It got cold too. 25* today.

{I know, I know. That's tropical compared to some of you. But it's cold enough for us. We don't miss 40* below zero.}

It may be cold, but it's beautiful. Bright blue skies and sunshine. The kind of day that makes winter not so dreary. We're supposed to move this summer. But Jake thinks we'll be staying another year. We should know in February. I'm ambivalent. Except when i'm not.

The boys spent a few hours clearing the driveway. Miss B was napping. Or she'd have been out with them.

Jacob is growing into quite a young man. I got him that hat for Christmas. I think he looks handsome. I think he's growing up too fast.

My Christmas present...
Perfect for using the camera during outdoor shoots. They didn't work as well as I hoped they would.
My thumb and index finger tips were FROZEN. It was exacerbated by their jealousy of my other toasty warm fingers.

Oh Josh. How I love your cheeks. And your straight teeth. The dentist says you won't need braces. That makes me happy. You've also got style. I love the vest and the jacket. The orange on orange works for you.

And how about you Mr. Sam-a-Lam? Oh goodness. You make me smile. Always. You and your tender heart which is also a lion heart.

Ho. Ho. Ho.

2010-12-27T13:26:00.000-09:00

Jake made it home in the nick of time.. Hallelujah. It was the best Christmas present ever.

Unfortunately, he brought home a nasty cold that we've all been battling since. It's the vicious variety that I believe is going to hang on for a while. Poor Miss B hasn't slept well in 3 nights.

But, he was here for our annual Christmas Eve celebration. And I was so glad! I couldn't have done it without him! Friends, dinner, nativity and toot-ta-dos. We look forward to it every year. We had a full house with 21 adults and 23 children.

Sam was Joseph. Josh was a shepherd. Jacob was... hmmm. He appears to be absent. Miss B was a lamb. However, she looked more like an exotic dancing lamb than an innocent Christmas Eve lamb. Note to self, perhaps next year a onesie with hot-glued cotton balls would be better than a crinoline slip with knee highs. I'm just saying...

But she loved it. She was the star. She danced and squealed and made a spectacle of herself.

That's my girl.

Here's what it looked like when Miss B wasn't hogging the limelight.

Christmas morning.

Miss B got a 4-wheeler. Although in this picture she appears to enjoy it, she actually hates it. This was when she thought it was just a fancy chair. Since she realized it actually moved, she has refused to go near it.

She also got her first real doll. She gave it kisses and has now ignored it since that moment.

In fact, Christmas pretty much bored her. She preferred to be sitting in the chair playing with the camera. She was pretending she got an iPhone. Which she would have preferred to all the gifts she actually received.

Somehow Santa got mixed up when he was arranging all the gifts in front of the tree. The Santa gifts were in back, but rather than the boring gifts in front, all the fancy toys came first so there was a lull in the excitement when they got to the pajamas and underwear. I bet Santa doesn't do that again.

Jacob got new clothes. And a Franklin Planner. He really wanted one. He reminded me practically everyday. Mom! I'd really like a Franklin. Christmas morning he posted on his Facebook wall "Yay! I got a franklin planner! So excited to start the new school semester!" His friends commented... What's a franklin planner?

What?!

Do you know what a Franklin Planner is?

Is it just me, or does he look like Wolverine in this picture?

The boys got rollerblades. And protective gear. Nothing says Christmas in Alaska like rollerblades. Am I right?

Yesterday while I napped, Jake and the boys put away all the Christmas decorations. Miss B is going to miss Santa. She loves him. He parachuted from our ceiling for a month. She would point and exclaim "Santa!". It's really her only discernible word. Santa, Santa, Santa. She really liked the old guy. Not so much the elf in the plane with the propeller, Santa himself was her favorite.

And when she met the Big Guy in person, she was just as thrilled.

I hope you all had a Very Merry Christmas!

Christmas Break

2010-12-20T18:34:00.001-09:00

I posted on Simply b today. {Click Here}

Christmas Sunday

2010-12-19T15:42:00.005-09:00

Miss B has beautiful eyes, doesn't she? Brilliant blue. And her gaze can be mesmerizing. But we don't get to see them often... thanks to her glasses.

I did a shoot a while ago for Banner Boutique of some gorgeous headbands they sent me. I wanted to use Miss B as a model {of course}, but her glasses don't work well with headbands. So we did the shoot without them.

I love the images. Miss B is just the cutest thing ever.

This one captures her personality. She has a quick grin. I miss her glasses though.

And she often stares at me just like this.

This is her Christmas dress. It's dupioni silk. And dry clean only. Not sure what I was thinking. Except I got a smokin' deal at Zulily. And she looks adorable in it with her ivory tights and patent leather shoes.

She was supposed to wear it today for Christmas Sunday. But she didn't. She wore her grey sweater and sparkly tutu that matched her brothers' sweaters. I'm saving the fancy dress for when Daddy gets home.

He's still in South America. His plane is broke. We don't know when he'll be home. His facebook status was "I'll be home for Christmas... if only in my dreams." I don't want to think about that right now.

Oh! Guess what? I'm going to be doing some traveling for the Day with Amy Photography Workshops. I'll be in Sacramento, Palmer, and North Pole. I'm also going to be doing some photo shoots while I'm there! If you are interested, let me know. Details at Simply b.

Mom Loves Sam Class

2010-12-13T17:21:00.005-09:00

There are years I am a holiday baker and years I am not.

This year I am not. While grocery shopping, I picked up a roll of cookie dough. Peanut Butter. With Hershey's Kisses to put on top. I figured the kids would have fun doing that and I'd be home free.

I also signed up to do a cookie exchange this weekend. I'm not sure what I'm going to bring yet. I'd like to think I'll get fancy, but I probably won't. But I'm hopeful I'll bring home dozens of goodies from women much more inspired to bake than I am. That's my hope. It's all the benefits without the work.

Have I told you about Mom Loves Sam Class? I can't take credit for the name. I got the idea from Rachel DeMille. There are times that Sam gets lost in our house. He's quiet and not inclined to demand attention. Though I'd go so far as to say he needs it more than his brothers. And so we started Mom Loves Sam Class. When he's feeling needy he'll say, "Mom? Can we do Mom Loves Sam Class?". And I'll stop what I'm doing and we'll do something together. He'll snuggle into my lap and read a book, or we'll go through his math worksheets or we'll do a project together.

Today we decided to make cake pops. Jacob made a cake yesterday and tried to take it out of the pan before it had cooled and it crumbled apart. I told him to save it for cake pops.

Have you made cake pops before? We made them for Jacob's Bake Sale last spring. That time I was very involved. This time I turned the creating over to my children. And I took pictures. And sampled the results.

*Disclaimer. These do not have a stick in them. Therefore they are not actually cake pops.

They are more like cake bites. Little pieces of heaven.

Place a baked cake in a bowl.

Make sure you get your cute kids in the picture.

And make sure they've washed their hands... See next step.

Tell your kids to break the cake up into tiny crumbs.

They'll know what to do.

{Reminder: Make sure they've washed their hands.}

Check on your toddler who loves to play on the dining table.

Make sure she's not too close to the edge.

Then decide to put her down for a nap.

Teach your child fractions by telling them to mix 3/4 of a jar of frosting in with the crumbs.

I'm not sure how I missed getting a picture of them mixing this part with their hands.

Maybe I did it on purpose.

Check out those baby blues. Sigh. He's going to be a heart breaker.

Especially now that I'm teaching him how to bake yummy goodies.

Encourage family fun.

All hands on deck.

Even boys studying for finals.

Roll the squishy stuff into balls.

If you visit Bakerella she makes all kinds of fancy shapes.

She's much more inspired than I am. Simple spheres were good enough for me.

Place them on waxed paper on a cookie sheet.

Put the cookie sheet in the freezer to harden the balls. 20 minutes or so.

Only one child will return after the 20 minutes is up.

The others will have disappeared.

It appears that the squishing of the batter was the best part.

But your devoted Sam-A-Lam will stay by your side and continue his class.

Melt your Wilton's Candy Melts in a microwaveable bowl.

Dunk your frozen balls in and cover it with chocolate. Or Candy Melt. Or whatever it is.

Sprinkle the freshly dunked balls with sprinkles.
Do it quick before the chocolate hardens. Or Candy Melt hardens. Or whatever it is.

Notice the unsprinkled balls? We were not quick enough.

So easy even an 8 year old can make them.

And he did. Isn't he talented?

Enjoy! Yummy Yum Yum.

Put some aside to share with neighbors before you try one.

Otherwise, none will leave your home.

They make a most delicious after nap snack.

The passing of the plague

2010-12-13T00:20:00.001-09:00

*This picture has nothing to do with this post. Except for the fact I wish this man was here to help me clean up all the vomit I did this week.

The worst of the plague seems to be over. Thanks for your kind words. I don't do well with vomit. Auntie Megan can attest. Boy, I was wishing she was here with me these last few days! Sam did great. He never missed the toilet. Josh? Not so much. Kid freezes when the retching begins. Which it did just moments after my previous post. And made for another long night of projectile vomiting.

I seemed to have been passed over by the plague, of which I am so very grateful.

It's late and Jacob's light is still on in his room. He's got finals this week. I'm proud of that boy. He's been nothing but helpful this week while he's been Man of the House. {Other than that one incident that left me in tears, but we won't talk about that.}

Josh is in bed with me again tonight. He kicked Sam out last night after the vomiting began.

He doesn't want to let go of his illness just yet even though it has proven to be a 24 hour bug. To the hour... at least with Sam and Miss B. You can never be quite sure with Josh. While he abhors the vomiting, he's a big fan of popsicles, 7-up, and laying in Mom and Dad's bed all day watching Netflix. I can relate.

Miss B and Sam are back to their normal selves.

I'm looking forward to my week. Lots to do, but in a good, enjoyable way.

I. Miss. Jake.

2010-12-12T01:20:00.004-09:00

Miss B recovered quickly. By Friday morning she was much better. And by evening, Sam was kneeling before the toilet... being quite brave, but suffering nonetheless. Josh and Jacob disinfected the house. They washed down every doorknob and light switch. Josh scrubbed the kitchen and Jacob steam mopped the floor. Last night was wicked. Sam slept in Jake's spot. Closest to the bathroom door. And he cried in his sleep all night. Every time he moved or moaned, I was on the lookout for retching.

He slept most of the day, in between trips to the bathroom. He cried because he missed the baptism of two of his friends, he missed getting to play in the new snow, and most of all he missed the birthday he's been looking forward to for over a month. I'm thankful that his friend's mom brought him a gift bag and a giant slice of cake (which his brothers promptly ate because Sam couldn't). This evening he was running a fever and still moaning, but he seems to be sleeping peacefully next to me.

As I was editing up a few pictures before heading to bed, Josh came down. It appears that he is now feeling the precursors to this nasty visitor. He laid on the couch behind me while I edited and he whimpered until I finished. We said a prayer together and asked that he feel better soon. He's currently asleep at the foot of my bed with a big metal bowl beside him.

I mentioned to Jacob that he better look out, he's next. But he reminded me that he was sick while we were in Anchorage. Sick enough he slept most of the time Jake and I were gone. So now it's just me. I'm hoping I'm immune.

I miss Jake. I miss him terribly. We're good together. We're not so good apart. I received news tonight that shook me to the core. News of someone I know just peripherally, but it left me anxious and confused and wanting to talk with my husband... and not via Skype. In person.

But for now I'll say a prayer and ask Heavenly Father to ease my mind. To give me strength. And to lift my burden. This too shall pass.

Season of Giving

2010-12-10T01:48:00.006-09:00

I'm looking for a family to give a photo session away to.
You can find details at Simply b.
Keep in mind I'll be in North Pole in May/June (details to be determined).

My message to Jake on Facebook this morning.

2010-12-09T05:12:00.001-09:00

Hi. Boo woke me up at 3:30 this morning and vomited all over our bed. Huge amazing chunks of rotten, curdled milk. *insert retching sounds here*

She hasn't gone back to sleep yet. (it's 5:08am). Obviously not going to Seminary. I was looking for an excuse, but not vomiting. Never vomiting.

I'm scared the boys are going to get it. The Davenports are SUPER sick, so are the Skinners. There's actually a LOT of kiddos down with nasty vomit bug (it's all over facebook).

I don't know what I'll do if the kids start vomiting. I can't handle that.

The boys were awesome this morning. Helped me remake the bed and started laundry. Although I went to change it over and realized that it was on Delicate. I'm wondering if it's been on delicate since you did that load of laundry for me. Probably.

I miss you. Why do the kids get vomit sick when you are gone? It's not fair.

Did you see the pictures I posted on Simply b of Miss B? I also posted fresh ones of the Meltons. I'm tired and wish I could sleep. This computer doesn't have Skype on it.

Do you have internet in your hotel room? Or just in the lobby?

Did I mention I miss you?

Picture Day!

2010-12-08T00:18:00.002-09:00

I made an attempt at family pictures today... {Continued over at Simply b Photos}

Jacob's Theatre Debut

2010-12-07T09:11:00.001-09:00

A year and a half ago (just days after Miss B was born) Jacob attended a two week theatre camp in Anchorage. He performed this pantomime with his cousin Andrew...

2:39 AM

2010-12-05T02:39:00.004-09:00

Jake is gone.

We had a quick 24 hours together in Anchorage before we parted ways at the Anchorage Airport. He left for South America two hours after I flew back to Kodiak.

I had been in the big city for a newborn photoshoot. Original schedules had us passing each other in flight. I'm glad he worked it so he could be with me. I miss him already. So does Miss B. We're downstairs on the couch looking at each other. She woke up at 12:45 and hasn't been able to go back to sleep. And she's all kinds of fussy. Perhaps she's feeling under the weather like her mum.

I can't decide if I'm sick or just overtired. I slept until noon this morning and went back to bed at 8. I'm hoping Miss B settles down soon because I'm exhausted and just want to sleep. She misses her daddy. She knows something isn't right in her world and it's distressing her. Her distress distresses me. And I have a headache. But I'm sure we'll both feel better soon.

She's wearing footy pajamas. Her blond curls are mussy, she's rubbing her eyes, and just yawned. The lights on the Christmas Tree are casting a warm glow and she couldn't be more adorable. I think we're going to try the sleep thing again...

P.S. It's now 3:27am and she finally relented and went to sleep. {Miss you Jake. Wish you were here.}

Composing a Memory

2010-11-27T09:34:00.004-09:00

I posted pictures of our Day After Thanksgiving Christmas Decorating over at Simply b Photos. {Click Here}

The pictures reflect moments. Happy moments. Composed and seen through a photographer's eye. And let's face it, I love to see my family in that light. Glowing and full of warmth.

But then again, pictures can be composed to create the image you want. And when you pull back from the closeup shots, you'd see that Joshua was still wearing his pajama bottoms. He never got dressed yesterday. Sam was wearing too small shorts. I was still in workout clothes {having not showered yet... or at all until 9pm}. Laundry was piled up, dishes in the sink, and there was a fair amount of hollering, arguing, and orneriness mixed in with the family togetherness.

By the end of the afternoon, Miss B looked like this...

Her onesie could have been a biohazard site. Stained with cranberry sauce, root beer and who knows what else. She had to be dipped in the tub before getting pajamas on.

But she was happy. And so were the rest of us. We'd had a good day. It wasn't perfect, but I enjoyed it. And the memories will be sweet. We'll remember the glowing and warmth. Just like I pictured it.

Much to be thankful for.

2010-11-25T23:37:00.005-09:00

I hope you had a wonderful Thanksgiving.

We started a new tradition this year. Each of my sons chose a pie that he wanted to make. And we made them.

Jacob chose pecan pie. We used Pioneer Woman's recipe. {I hope you know Ree. She's a regular member of the family around here. Sam was just talking about her today. He was suggesting that his dad just might be as good a cook as that Pioneer Woman. That's pretty high praise.} And when I say we used Pioneer Woman's recipe, what I really mean is Jacob used her recipe. Start to finish it was his doing. And it was yummy!

Sam chose key lime pie. Again we turned to Ree. She lent us a fabulous recipe that Jake and Sam whipped up together. They like key lime pie so much they made two of them.

Josh made chocolate cream pie. We couldn't find a recipe on Ree's own blog, and so we turned to her recipe site Tasty Kitchen. We found a decadent recipe with an Oreo crust (double stuffed even), chocolate pudding, cream cheese, cool whip, and Heath Bars. My. Oh. My. It was divine!

I made pumpkin pie and Jake made cheesecake.

It's safe to say there was no lack of dessert tonight.

Turkey either. Jake found a 30 pound turkey at the commissary. Look at the size of this thing! It barely fit in the roasting pan. We'll be eating turkey all week.

We had all the usual fare and our refrigerator is packed with leftovers. We had wonderful friends over to share the holiday and really it couldn't have been any nicer.

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Last night after the pies were prepared, we played Rumikub. Jake and Sam were on a team.

Josh concentrated.

Miss B played with cars in her high chair. {Note to self: Buy the girl some Barbies!}

Dad and Sam used strategy.

And it worked.

The smile of victory...

I am thankful for many things.

But my family tops the list. I am truly blessed.

Thank you to all my wonderful family and friends. I'm thankful that you take the time to check in with me to see what I'm up to. I wish we had been able to spend today together!

In. Som. Nia.

2010-11-23T23:38:00.003-09:00

It's 11:38pm. Two hours and 38 minutes ago I was so tired, I determined I was done working for the night. I could barely walk up the stairs. Now I'm wide awake and annoyed that I can't sleep.

So I decided to blog. I dislike blogging without pictures, but it will have to do tonight.

I'm sorry I haven't been a consistent blogger. The guilt of it weighs heavy, as if I've skipped church two weeks in a row. One week I can handle. But not two. Never twice in a row.

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I have good news! Miss B kissed me today. Like big ol' sloppy kisses on the mouth! She'll be 18 months old next week and she's never kissed me. Ever. It's been no end of consternation for me. It's not that she goes around kissing everyone else. She just doesn't kiss. Silly girl. I shouldn't be surprised. This is the same child who refused to hold her own bottle until she was 14 months old. She does things at her own pace, of her own accord.

But tonight, she was sitting on my lap and I asked her for a kiss {like I do one zillion times a day} and she started kissing me over and over again! I shrieked and laughed and hollered and then dragged her into the kitchen to show everyone. But she refused to dole out any more kisses the rest of the night.

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Last week was my busiest week ever with Simply b. I completed 12 photo shoots. They were all fantastic. I love taking pictures. What I love most is when my clients {and others} love their photos. I'm greedy for comments. Words of affirmation make me feel loved. I adore hearing from grandmas and grandpas! That's the best! Tonight a mom left a heart felt comment on her family's pictures that I posted and I almost cried from her sweet words! It truly makes it all worth it! I'll still be working until the new year, but nothing like the pace I've been keeping.

I'm taking the next 3 days off too. I still have some editing to do, but I'm going to let it be and just enjoy my family.

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Sam and I are going to make pies tomorrow. I love cooking with Sam-a-lam. He's so eager to help. And with his braces he seems so grown up. He and I have been reading Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. Last night Jake took Josh and Jacob to Harry Potter and Sam stayed home with Miss B and I. While I was editing he sat on the couch near me and watched the classic Charlie and the Chocolate Factory movie on Netflix. He was wearing headphones and every once in a while he'd yell something at me.

Mom! Look, it's Veruca Salt!

Mom! Look! He just found the coins!!

Mom! It's the EXACT part we're at!!

It made me smile to listen to him.

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Are you ready for Christmas? I am not.

I need to get on that. With as busy as we've been and the mild temperatures we've had {48* and no snow!}, it's hard to believe it's November and not September. Jake will be gone most of December. He's heading down to South America again. I'm keeping fingers crossed he makes it home for Christmas.

He's making Miss B a play kitchen. It is the cutest thing you've ever seen. I'm not sure if it will be done for Christmas or not. But I cannot wait to show it to you. You will be thrilled. I promise.

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I'm going to try and go to sleep now.

Saturday is a special day... at least it should be.

2010-11-15T00:23:00.003-09:00

Our Sabbath Day had a rocky start. One of those Sundays where everyone is running around, looking for socks, ties, undershirts, hairbrushes. Miss B was dressed. She's the easy one. Her hair pulled back in a little pigtail on top of her head, fancy hair clip attached. Her black and white polka dot patent leather shoes clip clopped across the kitchen floor. It was the rest of us that struggled. Well dressed Father. Half dressed children. And me, the furthest behind of everyone. There were angry words, and annoyed voices.

Mine halted everything. I observed the disaster that was our house. The clothing piled on our couch rivaled Mt. Everest. The garbage overflowing. My desk piled high with Christmas catalogs and a weeks worth of unopened mail. Dishes cluttering the countertop and I said enough. It came out more like ENOUGH!

We had a mini family council and sent everyone to go change. We spent the day putting our house in order. Cleaning, scouring, rearranging. Purging, mucking, and reorganizing. By 5pm I had a raging headache. But the deed was done. Jake sent me to bed and headed out to teach the Temple Prep class at church.

We should have done it all yesterday. Saturday is the day we get ready for Sunday. And we missed it. Our Saturday was madness instead. Madness doesn't prepare us for Sunday. Madness prepares us for chaos.

I desire a more serene Sabbath Day. And usually, it's what we get. Working together to get everyone out the door on time. Our new bishop, Bishop Black, has asked us to be in our seats 10 minutes early. Our bishop in North Pole asked the same thing of us. He quoted Elder Boyd K. Packer when he told us "Reverence invites revelation." {You can read Elder Packer's entire talk by clicking here.} And who doesn't need more personal revelation in their lives?

We found that when we heeded his council, our Sabbath was smoother, from start to finish. Simply the desire to be obedient and be 10 minutes early, helped. The chaos of Sunday morning was left behind and our thoughts were turned to allow the Spirit to permeate our home.

Next Saturday, I'm going to prepare more fully. And it should be easier, because my house is amazingly clean.

$50 Giveaway!

2010-11-11T10:17:00.002-09:00

My sister Amanda owns Bush Creative, a vinyl wall art business.

This Christmas season she's donating all the proceeds of her business to the Sub for Santa program!

AND she's offering Simply b Photos readers 10% off their order!

AND she's giving away a $50 gift certificate!

She's awesome like that!

I really want to help get the word out, because more sales means more for Sub for Santa!

CLICK HERE to get all the details of the giveaway and the discount.

*I hope you visit the link and enter. I mean, why not? It's $50 towards your own wall art!!

Land of the Lost

2010-11-10T08:43:00.003-09:00

There is a black hole in my house. It does not attract everything. Just some things. Specific categories of items that disappear and are gone forever.

Like Miss B's fancy hair clips. (Please see Exhibit "A") The ones I paid decent money for. I can always find the kind that came in the 12 pack from Target for $1.99. But the other, more expensive clips disappear into that black hole.

And swim goggles. The gravitational pull of the black hole is too intense for the goggles to resist. They simply release their hold on reality and allow themselves to be sucked in. Unfortunately their disappearance will not be discovered until moments before they are desperately needed. It's a tragedy really. By that time, they will never be found again.

I cannot leave out keys. This is a new occurrence, yet devastating none the less. The metal alloy in the chemical makeup of the keys must be a new attraction to the black hole. An attraction born this summer and bent on devouring all keys within it's path. We've searched and we've searched, yet they have simply been swallowed up by that area of space-time with a gravitational field so intense that its escape velocity is equal to or exceeds the speed of light. What hope do they have? There is no saving them.

Of course there is the odd item lost here and there. Like my Bare Escentuals lip gloss. Although, I suspect that may be more Miss B's doing than the black hole. I expect it to show up, unlike the items the black hole has so completely devoured.

Like my flip flops. The ones I bought on sale at REI when I was in California this summer. The flip flops that my feet dream of. The ugly grey rubber ones that I fell in love with the minute I tried them on. The shoes that massaged my feet with their little nubbies and cradled my toes when I walked. I have searched high and I have searched low. There is no other reasoning. They have been eaten. And I weep. I do not know their brand. They are irreplaceable. Especially for the price I paid. *sob*

I've googled and scoured the internet, looking for an answer to my problem. It appears that once a black hole has been created, there is no closing it. I'm doomed to lose expensive hair clips, swimming goggles, and keys of all combinations. And my favorite pair of shoes. NO!! I shall defy that one! I will no longer name a favorite. Perhaps that will trick the devious monster and it will leave my shoes alone.

Am I alone? Or do you have a black hole at your residence?

Life moving forward.

2010-11-08T22:11:00.004-09:00

Jake has taken over the feeding of the family. Evidently corn dogs and tater tots wasn't cutting it.
In the last few days he's made meatloaf, chicken enchiladas (the best I've ever eaten!), and teriyaki salmon salad.
Add in some french bread and pupmkin pie and we're eating better than we have in a while. Thanks Jake.

Laundry continues. It always continues. The sun will come up and there will be laundry to wash, fold, and put away.

Miss B... she continues to entertain us all. Her favorite pass time is dancing. She's a dancing queen.
I've got a video to show you soon.

And yes. She still has her binky.

She prefers to feed herself. It's not the cleanest business.

I love this little Miss B. And Oh Goodness!! I love those knee highs!

Help Needed...

2010-11-05T22:03:00.003-08:00

I'm hosting a giveaway on Simply b Photos! Shabby Lane Boutique is giving away a gorgeous flower headband to a lucky winner. Currently there are only 20 entries. Those are pretty good odds!

If you're reading this, I'm asking you to click on over to Simply b Photos {CLICK HERE} and leave me a comment there, entering yourself into the contest. (Really want to help out? Leave up to four comments!)

Don't think you'll use the flower clip? Win it as a gift for someone else!

I hope to have lots of comments and interest in the giveaway. I'm very interested in the product marketing side of the business and would love to have the opportunity to do more in the future! Your comments help!

AND! Shabby Lane is giving a 10% discount to Simply b fans until Sunday evening! See the giveaway post for details {CLICK HERE}

Thank you!!

P.S. Want to see Miss B's modeling debut? {Click Here!}

Sam. The Man.

2010-11-02T21:04:00.005-08:00

Sunday morning we arrived at church early. The boys dressed in their autumn colored argyle sweaters and Miss B wearing a dress my friend made her, also in autumn colors. I love a good set of coordinating clothing. Not too matchey/matchey, though. But coordinated enough to work well together.

I didn't get a picture of everyone. I had my eye {and my camera} set on Sam. Sam and Dad.

Sunday was Sam's big day. He was baptized a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. His baptism was held directly after church. The entire ward was in attendance. It was unfortunate the pipes were acting up and the font was filled with water that appeared much like pea soup.

But no matter. Each boy has their story to tell of their baptism day. From the forgotten camera at Jacob's to the flooding font at Josh's. Sam will tell of his pea soup.

In our church we don't baptize children until they reach the age of 8. We call it the age of accountability. By that age, children know the difference between right and wrong. That's important. Of course they'll make mistakes, we all do, and they can repent. We also baptize by immersion. Just as Jesus Christ was baptized. Sam was properly immersed and came up with a smile. Jake was smiling too.

As I watched the two of them, dressed in white, standing in the {murky} water, my heart was filled with joy. Another feeling mingled with the joy. I'm not sure I can identify it. Sadness perhaps? Is Sam really eight years old? Are all my sons now baptized? How can that be?

I watched as Sam changed before my eyes. Earlier that day he stood at the pulpit in front of a congregation of 100 members and bore his testimony. It was his first time. There was no fear, just confidence. He shared his testimony that he knows the church is true. That he knows President Monson is a prophet of God and that he was following in Jesus' example by being baptized.

Before his baptism I watched him approach six men from our ward (including the bishop) and invite them to help confirm him a member of the church. After his confirmation I watched as he shook each man's hand and then gave his father a hug.

He sat next to me as Jacob gave a talk on baptism. Jacob spoke eloquently, yet simply, about the importance of baptism and his love for Sam. Jacob's tears brought tears to Sam's eyes. My own were already bright.

What an extraordinary day. Later Sam and his brothers chose not to go trick-or-treating. After all, Sam was now perfect, fresh from baptism. And it is a commandment to keep the Sabbath Day holy, isn't it?

Baptized on Halloween. Just like his mother. Congratulations Sam.

Halloween... in pictures.

2010-11-02T20:51:00.000-08:00

What a difference a year makes.

2010-10-27T23:37:00.002-08:00

I was going through some old pictures and came across this gem.

*sigh*

Life moves too quickly, doesn't it?

The window faces east.

2010-10-26T22:26:00.003-08:00

This morning the truck was frozen solid and covered in hard frost. On the drive home from seminary at 7:45am it was still dark. Fall has settled on Kodiak and winter is knocking. Thankfully it's not the harsh winter that we experienced in North Pole. Although we have heard that La Niña will be visiting this year and we should expect an excess of wet, heavy snow. But for now we're adjusting to hard frost, a nip in the air, and leaves abandoning their trees.

We have one window in our home that faces east. Actually two. No, make that four. One in the kitchen over the sink. That's the first one I think of. The boys' bedroom has a nice east facing window as well. And so does their bathroom and the stairwell. But those two don't really count.

I like east facing windows. They are blessed with the gorgeous rays of morning sun. I love morning sun. It's my favorite. And I love this time of year. The sun streams through my kitchen window at 9:30am. I often lament that we don't have more windows to access that early morning light. Our big windows in the family room face west. There we get nice light in the afternoon. But I don't love that as much. I'd rather get my Vitamin D fill in the morning. If I could change one thing about our house I would rotate it to take advantage of the morning sun. But then I'd lose my view. And I wouldn't want that. So I'd really like Kodiak to shift entirely so that the morning sun rises over Barometer mountain and shines in my window. That is my Christmas wish.

This morning I watched as the sun peaked right into my kitchen window. I stopped what I was doing and coerced Joshua to come outside with me to catch some pictures. Initially we went across the street but I didn't like the other buildings in my way. We ran home for the truck and drove to an open field. Boy oh boy it was lovely. Josh was patient enough to stand still while I fiddled with my settings. And when we finished, Josh got to stomp his name in 10 foot letters in the frost. It was a win/win situation.

Where have I been?

2010-10-24T08:22:00.004-08:00

This morning I dropped Jake off at the airport. He'll be gone for a week and I miss him already. I should be getting ready for church. We have to leave in an hour. But instead I'm listening to Jon Schmidt on itunes and looking through pictures from the past few weeks.

Sam and I celebrated our birthdays. My 37th and his 8th. For the next two months Jake and I are the same age. Wednesday was our 16th wedding anniversary. Sweet Sixteen. That day I had writing class, a newborn shoot, and book club. Jake bought me roses.

Jacob completed mid-terms and received an honors on his oral exams. He's adjusting to fitting early morning seminary into his schedule and will shortly be adding swim team again. All three of the boys are participating this year. Did you hear Sam got braces? (look for an update this afternoon... I'll add a picture!)

Yesterday was my second photography workshop. I love every minute of them. I love the ah-ha moment when someone learns the relation of aperture, shutter speed, and ISO and how they work together to create a perfectly exposed picture. And true to form Jake created an amazing meal. This time we took time to savor and enjoy it. And he added cheesecake to the menu.

In my A Day with Amy Photography Workshop presentation, I talk a bit about how I became interested in photography. My interest/obsession came after I started blogging. I wanted to take pictures to help tell my story. I craved the creativity and talent of my fellow bloggers and I wanted to try.

It's been a journey. It is a journey. And I love every step of it. What I love most is documenting our family. Recording our family history through photographs. It's not about the perfect portrait. Really it isn't. Although I love a good portrait. It's about the pictures that tell our story.

Ruffles

2010-10-14T15:25:00.003-08:00

Miss B makes me smile. She's our little fashionista. I have a weakness for clothing. Always have. Having a little girl has only made it worse. It doesn't help that each time Miss B debuts a new look, her daddy swoons. He'll declare that she can't possibly get any cuter.

She's learned to model her new outfits. She shrugs her shoulders and turns around, looking coyly at her daddy or brothers. Or whoever is watching.

My super talented friend Jana made this cute outfit for Miss B! {She's getting an Etsy store up and running. I'll post more about it soon.} Miss B loves these little pants! The ruffles are her favorite part.